How to Fail the SATs

People think it's easy to fail the SATs... but how easy is it to fail the SAT and have FUN doing it??

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Really understanding parents
• Hopefully stellar GPA to make up for poor SAT scores
• Vodka
• And a number 2 pencil

1. 
    

   Show up to the test hungover... Or better yet still drunk from the night before. I guarantee that your fellow test-takers will appreciate your lovely alcohol smell and frisky behavior!

2. 
    

   Draw pictures with the scantron bubbles (My personal favorite was when I drew an exact replica 1:64 of the Eiffel Tower. Coincidentally, my score on that SAT was 164. Total.)

3. 
    

   Better yet, play BLACKOUT! with your scantron (It's tougher than you might think to fill in every single bubble in the given time - Click on picture to expand)

4. 
    

   Cheat from the guy next to you. (Hey! He looked really smart. little did I know that there are Versions A and B of the test. His 1520 on Version A correlated to a 370 on my Version B)

5. 
    

   Write the essay with your non-writing hand (Your essay might be rich in content, but the scorers will think a second grader wrote it and automatically downgrade you and send a personal letter to your parents asking if you "had a medical condition". Trust me... been there, done that)

6. 
    

   Last, try taking the SATs in a foreign lanugage you dont know (It's called "culture-broadening". Who WOULDN'T want to try to decipher Mandarin Chinese for the first time in the middle of the test?)

Tips & Warnings

• (Make sure you get the consent of parent/guardian before trying this)
• If you don't, be warned that they might try to kill you!

[harvardbanana]

on 7/21/2009 Here's a fantastic article on CRITICAL READING:

http://www.ehow.com/how_5193165_attack-critical-reading-section-effectively.html

[asksummer]

on 7/19/2008 I think this is funn! My husband laughed his @$$ off!