How to Get a Detention

While most students shudder at the thought of getting an after-school detention, there are occasions when it might be coveted. Maybe your best friend has received one, or that special girl or guy you're trying to meet is going to detention at the same time. Whatever the reason, here's a few tried and true methods of getting the detention you crave.

Instructions

1. Read your school handbook, paying special attention to the sections concerning violations. Memorize a few that specifically warrant detention. For example, horseplay and pushing usually carry the penalty of detention.

2. Listen carefully to each teacher's classroom rules. If the teacher expresses a particular pet peeve, take note and use it to your advantage in the quest for an after-school detention. Missing homework and being late for class are sure to get attention and possibly detention.

3. Plan your offense carefully. Timing is the most important element here, because you have to commit your detention-earning violation in plain sight of a school official. Wait until the teacher or other official is looking directly at you and make your move.

4. Sneer when caught. If you look apologetic or fearful, the teacher might feel sorry for you and let you off the hook.

5. Remember to brag a bit after receiving your official after school detention. That way, the object of your plan overhears the news.

6. Bask in the glory of your under-achievement.

Tips & Warnings

• Teachers especially dislike missed assignments, students talking during lectures and if all else fails, the time-honored throwing wads of balled up paper is an extremely effective in receiving a detention.

• Weigh the consequences you're going to suffer because of your actions. Detention may be least of your concerns, as your parents may have a separate punishment in store. Repeated offenses could lead to tougher forms of discipline, up to and including expulsion.