How to get your Rich Friends to give you money!

Most of us have these wonderful friends with pots of money. Let's face it, we all know them. We see them at the health club or at their swank cocktail parties, bar mitzvahs, weddings, at the market or book shop. They invited us to brunch and dinner and little shows their lovely darlings put on at numerous events. And we go. Here we are struggling to get by, driving our late model car which clanks as it pulls up their enormous circular drive, and we think, "how can this be my life? Why are some people so blessed, and I'm back to macaroni and cheese tomorrow?" And the question we dare think, but never ask is, "If they're so rich, why won't they help me?" Well follow my handy dandy advice and maybe, just maybe your friend will lend a hand, where ever a hand might be needed.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• imagination
• winning smile
• some rich friends
• some really good ideas
• humility
• charm

1. HOW MUCH? This is the first big question you must ask yourself. How much money do you need? What is it going to take to get you to where you want to be. Don't kid yourself, asking for it all probably isn't a good thing, and people with money are in my estimation, the stingiest people going. It seems that they have money because they are so reluctant to part with it. So the first question we must always ask ourselves when thinking about approaching a rich friend for money is, "how much?" When you can come up with a reasonable dollar amount, move on to the next step (and by reasonable I don't mean a zillion dollars).
2. PLAN. The next step is to establish a plan of action. You want to ask your friend for money, but when you do, they're going to ask you, "What's it for?" When you tell them that you want to live the life they have, they'll give you a disgenuous laugh and think you're joking and you'll end up walking down that long drive with your tail between your legs and you'll certainly be the talk of the town at the golf club or Ladies' tea the next day.
3. SET COURSE IN ACTION. Okay, you're saying, "but Richard, you haven't helped me yet." Okay here's where we set the plan in motion. I'll tell you a few secrets that not very many people know about. The first is, most people aren't just going to give you money. It just doesn't happen. And if they do just give you money to say, get you a better car, or put little Johnny in to prep school, you will either have a loan, or just be eternally indebted to them. And let's face it, none of us wants that. And so my friends, I say, come up with an idea. What you need now is a project. I don't know what your time frame is, but give yourself enough time to come up with an idea. It must be something that your friend can "invest in." This is important. Perhaps you want to start a not-for-profit farm that brings impoverished inner city children to the country where you provide therapy through art and nature. Okay, this is a big deal, and one you must follow through, but your friends will give you money toward that end, and as Executive Director of the non-profit, you can give yourself the salary that they command.
4. SELL SOMETHING. This is another idea that seems to work. I once made a hefty sum of money. I want to tell you how this happened for me so that you might best employ these methods (tailored to you of course) to do this. I had a cocktail party. At this party I invited some of my contemporary artist friends and some of my swanky millionaire friends. Everyone knows that the arts and the money seemingly go together, and everyone likes a decent piece of art hanging over the piano in the music room. Well before the end of the night was finished, I'd introduced some of the artists to some of the patrons and the next thing I know a show was set up at the artist's studio to which I was invited and the paintings were sold (at 14k a piece mind you) to one of my friends, and the money was passed through me. And the artist informed me that as art manager I was entitled to a 30% commission. In a single night I'd earned a fortune, without even trying and I was set up into my own business! Just like that. I didn't really have a "thing" to sell perse, but what I did sell was my contacts to the very artists. I was the liaison. My friends got the paintings, the artists sold the paintings, and I continued my business for quite some time thereafter as my named was passed down the line from millionaire to millionaire (as someone we can trust). Of course I helped it along by stating that the paintings would increase in value, and indeed they have!
5. APPROACH. Okay, so you have this great idea for selling pork bellies, or investing in off-shore blah blah blah, or whatever. So there you are with the idea. The very worst thing you can do is go directly to your friend and pitch the idea, because they'll say you don't have experience, blah blah blah blah, and steal the idea out from under you. Or discount you and there you are again wagging your tail as you trot down the drive. No, when you go to approach them, what you need to do is to pull what I call the "shakespeare" trick.
6. The Shakespeare Trick. So now you want to know what it is? I don't know how many of you out there have actually read Shakespeare, but the one thing you'll realize about his work is that he often said terrible things about the royals or politicians or whatever, having his political voice heard through his works. But he could've been be-headed or some such worse castrophes for having said these things, so instead he always had a character say, "While I'd never say this, I've heard it said..." in that way they couldn't be accused of saying it, but just passing along hearsay. How does this apply to you? Well, when you come up with the "plan" leave a step or two out and then, when you are with your friend you might say, "This isn't something that would interest you of course, but a bunch of us are getting together and...well I really shouldn't say anything." Let them take the bite. They'll press you for more. If they don't take the bait you could say, "and we're thinking we'll make piles of money..." that usually works. People are always willing to invest in something that will give them a good return on their money. With Art it's totally subjective. I would say something like, "Don't buy a piece because of what it might be worth in the future (and then under your breath you say, "although this piece will be worth millions -or something like that), but because you like it and that it means something to you." In this way you protect yourself. And then you can say there are others interested in the piece and that there is no guarantee that it will be around if some other person wished to purchase it. The same can be said of antiques, or jewels. Stick with items that have no real known value. You can even do this with stamps. I've a bunch from Iran and Iraq and Israel. Well my friends, who knows.
7. Once you make the pitch be brief. Don't linger. Once you plant the seeds in that rich soil, you have to allow time for it to grow. Very often a friend will ask you to show them a business proposal, or a flyer from the gallery. You should have already started putting something together at home. But don't bring it with you, because that wasn't your intention. It's almost always more effective if you say something like, "well, I have to make a few calls and see if they'll let you in on in, or let me check with the gallery) and then a pause a minute as you're grasping the door knob at or having the butler get your coat and say, "I'm going to write a number down for you. Why don't you call me at around 2 tomorrow and I'll set something up - if you're really interested). Remember, people are always looking for a return on their money, and they are almost always more willing to invest in a friend, especially if their "poor" friend is seemingly "in the know" on to something, and doesn't really need or want their money.
8. ENJOY. Get the check. Do the work. And enjoy. What I realized by doing the whole art thing was that, without even trying, I really did bring joy into the lives of my friends. They love their paintings. Most of them still have them hanging in their houses. And guess what, the paintings did increase in value (one of the artists had an unfortunate accident and her art prices soared). So, not only did you give your friend and opportunity to help you out financially, you may have helped them out as well.

Tips & Warnings

• Most friends want to help you, but don't know how. They can't just give you money because (especially with old money) it isn't in their make-up. You need to give them a way to give to you that is beneficial to both you and them.
• Be honest. While this whole notion may seem deceptive, if your motives are pure, if you have a real beneficial kind of turn to whatever it is you're promoting, you can still sleep at night.
• Realize that it's a gift to allow someone to help you. If they're a good friend, chances are that they know that they aren't really investing in your ice stand or donut shop or whatever your cause is, despite what you tell them the profit margin is, they will know that they are investing in you. Chances are pretty good that they wouldn't take the same chances on a stranger.
• use a reputable CPA. It's best to keep everything on a spreadsheet.
• Do your homework. If you want to start a non-profit to give yourself a job that pays well, learn all you can about it first.
• Don't be a con. Follow through. If you say you are going to use the money to do a thing, then do that thing.
• Be upfront with the money. Don't get a million and then buy a new ferrari. Wait until the profits come in. But do take the money you should be getting for whatever it is you are doing and are entitled to. Just make sure that what you are entitled to is the right amount (yes we can all inflate the amount!)