How to Blow Benniwhads in your Shubashuda

I am writing this shortly after midnight on April Fools Day. Proceed throughout this article with that in mind.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• sense of humor

1. Each step in this April Fools Day article will be highlighted with different titles this article could have been given. The first potential title is "How to take a chance on looking innocently ridiculous." I thought about the practicality of posting this article before I did. I said to myself "people might doubt your seriousness in other areas." But that was a chance I decided to take. If someone wants to judge your entire persona on one article or comment you make then that's unfortunate. We all have the ability to be serious, and mentoring on some occasions, while being humorous during others. The key is in the timing. As long as your humor isn't hurting anyone else then it's all good.
2. Possible Title #2: "How to create (potential) new words." The words "benniwhad" and "shubashuda" just happened to pop into my head after a good glass of wine. This has happened to me at other times too. I have yet to find a valid source of income through this skill. If anyone has advice on this I am all ears. But lets face it, every word we use had to start from somewhere. Some words or phrases have their 15 minutes of fame and then are seldom heard from again, while others go down in History and end up on the Rosetta Stone. At the time of this writing, "Shubashuda" did not bring up any results in Google. I'll admit that I did not cross reference all languages for this word or "benniwhads". So if these words mean "disrespect your ancestors" in any culture I assure you it was totally by mistake.
3. Possible Title #3: "How to read your personality." When you saw the title for this article there are several ways you could have reacted. The fact that you have read this "how to" this far is a good sign. It shows you are open minded and curious about things. However, If your first reaction was, "This is stupid!" then you might want to tone down on the pessimism a little. If you saw the phrase "blow benniwhads in your shubashuda" and automatically expected something X rated then you might be a little perverted...maybe.
4. Possible title #4: "How to measure your viewership on EHow". As time goes on I will see if anyone comments on this article and how many overall views I get on it. For all I know I could have 5 views on it a year from now. And all 5 of them will be me checking back anonymously for missed Grammar errors. Or this article could go down as one of the highest viewed in Ehow history! But either way, I'm 99.9% certain, nobody is ever going to do a search on here for the title of this article before they have seen it. "How to tune up your car?" sure. "How to cook salmon?" good chance. "How to Blow Benniwhads in your Shubashuda?" doubtful. But if I get a lot of hits on this article then chances are people came across it while reading my other articles. We can all benefit from this insight. If you ever find people commenting on different articles you have written about totally different topics then that is a good sign. The chances that the same reader would just happen to come across both of your articles in random searches is a coincidence. Most likely they read one of your articles, liked it, and then browsed the rest.