How to Cope With an Overbearing Inlaw
A new marriage is full of excitement and romance as you start a new journey with the person you love. However, a new marital relationship can become strained if your new inlaws are having trouble "letting go" of their child. In order to survive with overbearing inlaws, get on the same page with your spouse and handle the situation together.
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Instructions
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Set boundaries with your spouse. Sit down with your spouse and agree together on what is preferable for a close family relationship. Consider all factors such as holidays, weekend visits, family dinners and phone calls and decide together how much time you will see each family.
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Defend your spouse. If your mother says something harsh either to your wife or about her, stand up and defend her. Tell your mother that you love your wife and whatever negative thing is said about her, hurts your feelings as well. This will show the offender that it's not acceptable behavior and won't be tolerated.
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Choose not to compete. For many mothers-in-law, there is the sense that their son has been "stolen" away and they may have a hard time letting him go. As the new wife, allow her some time to adjust to sharing her son and do not become jealous if she needs his time more than you think is necessary. However, if it begins to bother you, speak to your husband and see if he can work out a compromise with his mother to ensure that everyone stays satisfied.
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Speak honestly with your family. If your parents are the ones that are having a hard time letting go, reassure them that you love them. However, be sure to also remind them you and your spouse are working on creating your own family as well. Even though you may not be able to see them as often as you once did, it doesn't have to change your relationship.
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Comments
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Photogirl1971 you hit the bulls eye on that one...... I totally agree... It is very sad........... They just don't get it for some reason, and they would have all there family together, if they would just listen to every one saying the same thing u think they would get a clue........:D
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You are the most overbearing inlaw I have ever had
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any advice
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my brother in law is all of this and its way out of control hes got to point hes interfered in our lives our marriage our friendships former roommates and has made threats name calling threats to my husband his own brothers life its way out of hand.brother in law has put me down called me names made up lies to downgrade me made up lies to come between our marriage friendships we have between our family and threats if we talk to others of physical harm this happens when he font get what he wants from a person and don't get his way.
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jasperjar
Jan 14, 2010
My sister in law is so overbearing, opinionated, manipulative and controlling. I find the same thing, she can't handle anything bad being said about her and when it is, she becomes even more overbearing to make herself feel strong again after feeling "attacked". Everything is about what she would do or "If I were you..." She is a smart woman, but opinionated and smart are two different things. She likes to boast how wise she is, but wisdom seems far from her, it's almost like she has to promote how wonderful she is to make up for her lack of actually believing it herself. I tend to stay away as much as possible, and when she's on one of her opinionated binges, I tend to react in a passive agressive way, as she doesn't listen to the upfront tactic. I think if I don't find a way to deal with this, I will go crazy!
