How to Cope With an Ungrateful Eighteen Year Old Daughter

Your daughter has finally reached the age of 18, and you think perhaps your job will finally get a little easier. That could be wrong thinking-as the parent of any 18-year-old will tell you. Learning to cope with an ungrateful 18-year-old daughter takes patience, understanding and time.

Instructions

1. Give her the space she requires. When she was a little girl, she wanted you involved with every aspect of her life from her daily activities to her friends. This is no longer the case. She's a grown (albeit young) woman who needs her own personal life. Comment on her choices only when asked to do so-especially if your opinion is negative. It's easier to cope when you don't antagonize one another.

2. Allow her to make minor mistakes. No parent wants to see his or her child trip and fall, but the days of constantly protecting her are at an end. Unless you see a train wreck coming (such as activity that could lead to jail time), let her slip and fall when she makes poor choices. It will enable her to grow past the ungrateful "know it all" stage.

3. Your daughter has finally reached the age of 18, and you think perhaps your job will finally get a little easier. That could be wrong thinking-as the parent of any 18-year-old will tell you. Learning to cope with an ungrateful 18-year-old daughter takes patience, understanding and time.

4. Encourage dialogue whenever you can, rather than scheduling talks. She's more likely to open up to you when talking over something trivial. Anytime she wants to talk, become a willing participant in the conversation. You never know when a deeper, more important conversation will develop.

Tips & Warnings

• It helps to remember that she's a grown up who in some ways is still a child. This perspective can help you keep your cool when she acts petulant or standoffish.

• Think of the big picture during the frustrating times. As your daughter matures, she'll get her own job and car, and eventually move out to become an independent adult. If you keep your cool and provide gentle encouragement during the bumpy times, your relationship is likely to end up a more positive one.

• Privacy is paramount to 18-year-old girls. Never pry unless you there are signs of a serious problem such as drugs or alcoholism. She'll only become angry and pull away the same way you would if a neighbor were constantly snooping in your business.