How to Deal With a Flake

A flake is a person who constantly doesn't show up for plans or never returns phone calls. Inconsiderate and frustrating, a flake may never change their ways. Often, others just overlook their behavior and chalk it up to a character flaw. However, there are ways to deal with a flake that don't involve ignoring the situation and allowing frustration to fester.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Choose friends wisely and eliminate the problem altogether. This doesn't apply to those you've been friends with for a long time, but when making new friends, gauge the flakiness factor and if you feel they'll only let you down, decide not to pursue the friendship.
2. Confront the flake. Don't accuse them or come at them with negativity, however. Calmly tell them that you don't appreciate being stood up, not called back, or whatever the case may be. Talk with the flake and tell them, from the heart, how it makes you feel when they act flaky. Ask them why they are the way they are and what it would take to make them more responsible.
3. Consider ending the relationship if talking doesn't work. If a flake is constantly a source of frustration and anguish in your life, it may be easier to just let them go. It may hurt in the beginning, especially if you don't have many friends, but it's worth it to not be consistently disappointed and angry.
4. Make plans that only involve the flake when you don't mind weather or not they show up. This ensures the relationship is only on your terms. For example, invite them to your party only when you don't care if they come because you'll be busy having fun with everyone else who bothered to come. Or, only invite them somewhere if you are already planning to go without them. This way, they'll never disappoint you.
5. Stay busy and surround yourself with caring people. If you are constantly out with others and always have someone to call when your friend acts flaky, it may not bother you as much. Also, your feelings will be less dependent on the actions of the flake, making it much easier to blow off their flaky behavior.