How to Teach Your Child To Be Respectful.

A child is a parent's most prized possession. We should do all that we can to make sure that our child will have the best opportunity to 'make it' in this world. A child who exhibits the character trait of respect, for himself and for others, will have a better advantage than a child who does not. This article will supply you will a few techniques to help your child develop this character trait.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Patience and understanding.
• Insight into everyday situations and interactions with others.
• Ability to be consistent.

1. A parent who wishes to teach his child to be respectful must begin so by exhibiting this particular character trait. You cannot successfully teach a child to do something that he does not witness from others. A child will not do as you say, but will do as he or she has seen done by others.
   
   You must talk respectful of others: your neighbors, the mailman, the preacher, and especially your spouse. You must be able to accept the ideals and opinions of others, though you may disagree, without attacking others, and expressing behaviors that are disrespectful. Your child is watching you. For a child to be successful in this life, he must learn to get along with others in a civil manner, and to respect the different ideas and behaviors of others though different from his own ideas and behaviors.
2. The parent who desires to teach a child to be respectful must also respect the child. For a child to be able to respect himself, he must be respected by his parents. A child learns by watching his parents and picking up information as much by what is 'not said' as what is spoken. Several ways to show your child respect are listed as follows:
   1.) Listen to your child. Don't interrupt when he is talking. Be open to his ideas, and allow him to express himself. Don't supply a critical remark. Don't critique what he is saying. Allow him to say what he needs to say, and give him time to do so. This does not mean to allow your child to be disrespectful to you. When conversing, the conversation should be a two way interaction: You say something, then the child says something, without the parent being critical. This empowers the child with self esteem which is a building block for showing respect to others. You are respecting your child, and by so doing you are teaching him how to respect himself and others. Very good!
   
   2.) You cannot allow you child to treat you disrespectful. If you do, you are teaching him to treat others the same way. Never allow your child to say hurtful, offensive, aggressive things to you or others. If your child is already in these behaviors, it is going to be hard to stop. The first step in preventing or correcting your child from exhibiting negative behaviors is to never allow your child to observe such negative behaviors; the second step is to never give your child the opportunity to 'practice' what he has seen performed. If your child begins with disrespectful behavior, send him to his room using a calm voice. Allow him time to think about what he has done, then enter his room and speak to him in calm tones, allowing him also time to respond. State firmly that "Disrespect will not be tolerated within this home. This home is a haven for all who live here, and you will act accordingly." If you don't get all emotional when you correct your child, your child will 'hear' what you are saying, and will not learn to be 'emotional.'
   3.) Allow your child to make decisions. You can begin by giving your child the choice between two good alternatives. Avoid being the decision maker concerning everything your child is to do. Providing choices shows your child respect, which is also teaching him to be respectful.
   4.) Ask for your child's input into family matters.
3. Never allow your child to hear you say harsh, negative things about others. You can disagree with the behavior and opinions of others, but don't show disrespect while doing so. You may disagree with your child's teacher, but don't criticized the teacher in front of your child. If the offense of the teacher is not detrimental to the development of your child, use this as a time to teach your child to be cooperative, and a 'law abiding citizen.' A child must learn to obey the law; teaching a child to obey the teacher, even when there are conflicts of opinions is teaching your child to respect all authority figures. To criticize a teacher and confront them on every issue is teaching your child to rebel against the teacher, as well as others. By not respecting your child's teacher, you are hurting your child for a life time. Teachers are not going to do things correctly every time. Teachers make mistakes. When parents aren't supportive of teachers and understanding to the fact that teachers do make mistakes, it is teaching the child to be disrespectful. The teacher and the child enter this tug of war. The experience is not good for the teacher; not good for the child. What are these parents teaching their child: "How to disrespect authority." This is not good, for this type of attitude and rebellious behavior will be carried over to other authority figures. A student who does respect a teacher is not being taught correctly, but a child who doesn't respect the law and law enforcement agents is headed for more than after school detention; he is headed for prison. When your child comes home and is not happy about what is going on at school, encourage him to cooperate, and be 'nice' to his teacher. If there appears to be a big problem going on at school, don't say anything negative in front of your child. Go to the teacher and speak with her ASAP. If a problem, like a dandelion, is 'up-rooted' when it is first begins to appear, the problem won't become a bigger problem. Teachers are there for your child; they will appreciate your input and concerns.
   Follow these suggestions also apply to the preacher, to the neighbor down the street, to grandparents, to the school bus driver, and to your spouse.

Tips & Warnings

• A child must learn to respect authority. If he does not, he will learn to confront authority figures, and this behavior will encourage him to be aggressive, demanding, unruly and rebellious. A child must be able to function in this society with some level of cooperation, or this child is being set up for doom. Most prisoners did not just pop up one day and decide that they were going to become a prisoner. Most prisoners began their path toward prison as a child, learning those inappropriate behaviors as they interacted with the people in their environment. Who were the people in a typical child's environment: parents, teachers, school bus drivers, the neighbor next door, and the preacher. You have the power to make a good citizen or a prisoner. In what direction are you turning your child?
• If you run your mouth in front of your child, talking about everyone around, you are teaching your child to do the same thing.
• If you are critical of others and refuse to respect the opinions and behaviors of other, you are teaching your child to do the same thing. A short little story: We had this little duck. He had no mother or siblings. He stayed in the back with a few pigs. This little duck ate slop with the pigs; this little duck slept on top of the pigs' backs. This little duck acted like a pig because that's is what he was seeing done. A child is similar. A child will do what he sees done. Show respect to others and your child will do the same.