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Step 1
Be confident. Whether you choose to tell each member personally or the family as a group, tell them your views with conviction. The more self-assured you are, the less likely they will deride or belittle you. Take the position that you're OK with your choice and they should be too.
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Step 2
Allow your family time to accept your message. Most likely, your explanation will first be met with disbelief. It will take them time to process the information you have shared with them. Reassure them that you are comfortable with the fact that you are gay, and that they had nothing to do with your revelation.
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Step 3
Determine who in your family will be most receptive to your message and tell that person first. Then be sure that person is present when you tell others because it will boost your confidence. If you have guessed wrong about that person, choose another.
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Step 4
Reassure your family that you feel your message should not alter your relationship with them. While you have finally chosen the lifestyle that is most acceptable to you yet different from theirs, your connection to them, and others with whom you are close, should not change.
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Step 5
Be prepared to reaffirm your message. Often, family members will find acceptance of your message difficult to accept. But if they continue hearing your decision and you demonstrate your happiness with your life, they will be more accepting of your choice.
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Step 6
Reinforce to them that you are happy with your decision and expect to live a fulfilling, rewarding life. Too often, relatives may feel that you have no control over your decision and that you have succumbed to a life of unhappiness. Over time, they will understand that you feel a sense of relief for having finally made the decision, and you have told them.
