How to Confront a Gossip
It is very upsetting hearing someone gossip about you. Whether it's idle chatter from a jealous co-worker or serious slander that actually turns your friends against you, confronting a gossip isn't pleasant or easy, but sometimes you just have to do it. Here's how.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Stay calm. Angry outbursts only fuel the gossip's fire. Remove yourself from the situation until you can gain your composure. Give yourself time. Don't even think about talking with the source of the rumor about any subject until you know you won't lash out.
-
2
Approach the gossip in a safe, low-key environment. Don't call him or her out at a board meeting or in a school cafeteria. Rather, in a cool, controlled manner mention that you know what people are saying about you. Remain detached and above the situation by remarking that it's sad how much time some people have to waste spreading lies and distorting the truth.
-
-
3
Control the situation. Avoid the impulse to defend yourself or discuss the accusations--this only validates the gossip and give him or her an opportunity to make you look bad. Don't give your slanderer a chance to make you angry. Say what you came to say and then leave without another word. Gossiping is an act of cowardice and you can intimidate your gossip through your cool and pointed behavior.
-
4
Refuse to lower yourself by gossiping in retaliation. Responding in kind makes you as bad as the person who spread lies about you.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
Running around trying to defend yourself against rumors only makes you look weak and desperate--and possibly guilty. Don't acknowledge the rumors to anyone else and, if they come up in your presence, laugh them off. Show others that these false rumors have no power over you.
