How to Recognize Spouse is an Alcoholic

Alcoholics can be deceptive, and they can disguise the addiction from others with a variety of savvy strategies. However, if you're aware of certain telltale signs and refuse to linger in denial, you can spot whether your spouse has a drinking problem. Once you know, you can act to help.

Instructions

1. Look for patterns in their drinking. Keep a diary or some other written record of what happened and when. Write down situations that seem to trigger drinking like fights, stress or social situations.

2. Listen for the blame game. Bosses, children and the concerned spouse are common targets for blame. The alcoholic spouse will overreact to minor irritations or situations and use them as an excuse to drink.

3. Ask other family members if they feel ignored or neglected. The concerned spouse begins to compensate for the other's lack of participation. Family time begins to include only one spouse and the children and everyone learns to expect the alcoholic spouse to contribute little if anything.

4. Watch for a decline in work performance or difficulties keeping a steady job. Finances become difficult and this pressure often leads to depression, which then drives the alcoholic further into drinking.

5. Attend an Al-Anon meeting designed to support families and friends of an alcoholic. These meetings have information on alcoholism and can give an unbiased opinion on your situation and offer support to the family.

6. Watch your spouse's behavior. Note if he finishes your drinks for you, often orders "one more for the road," and speaks about getting drunk as something that happens to him ("They kept filling my glass") rather than a behavioral choice he made. Be especially concerned if he drives after drinking and take proactive steps to stop that behavior.

Tips & Warnings

• If your spouse has a flask, consider that a danger sign.

Resources

• Click here for a listing of local support group meetings.