How to Tell Your Family About Your Interracial Relationship

It’s looks perfect when it’s “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” or any other movie where love transcends all lines. In reality, the pressures of introducing a special someone who doesn’t look like your family to your family can be overwhelming. While we’ve come a long way from stereotypes, racism and other social morays, interracial dating can still present problems. To make matters worse, those obstacles are rarely as high as they are at a first meeting.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

1. Feel out your family. You know them better than anyone. You know if they’ll have any issues regarding your partner’s race and culture. Be honest with yourself.

2. Prepare your partner. Tell them about your family and any issues you feel are present. Don’t lie to your partner but you don’t have to be painfully honest. Be truthful but diplomatic, you don’t want them to hate your family.

3. Find a family member to talk to. Find someone in your family you can talk with and let in on the upcoming surprise. They can help you find the best approach to introduce your new romance. They can also help when you must break the ice. A family member you can confide in can also be a relief to your inner stress.

4. Plan time to talk. While there’s no such thing as a perfect time, there are definitely bad times. Control the environment and try to get the best situation possible. Possibly something private or something public, a small setting or an activity can be chances for the big introduction.

5. Talk to your family without your partner first. Let your family know about your new love without them present. It’s not fair to your family or your partner to drop each other on one another. Let your family know that what your partner means to you, what makes them special and the other positives. Spend less time on their differences. Do not back down if there’s resistance. Be respectful but stick to your wants.

6. Introduce your partner and your family. The big moment doesn’t have to feel like the world is hanging by a thread. Bring them together and treat it as you want it to be treated. Keep the introduction contained and have a backup plan in case you need to shorten the meeting and go spend time with your honey.

7. Be patient and hopeful. Changes don’t happen overnight and while you obviously accepted the differences of your special one, your family may need more time. Give it to them and allow time for your loved one to accept them as well.

[SFNCS03]

on 7/13/2008 Great advice, thanks.