How to Name Your Pet

Here I'll teach you how to give interesting names to your pets.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• A working knowledge of titles
• A unnamed pet
• Your imagination

1. 
    
   Senators Sam and Zelda Pancakes

   Acquire a pet

2. 
    
   Sir Roanoke P. Fiddlyseed, Duke of Verisimilitude, and Eorl of the Hamlet of East New Brunswick

   First think of a Title, such as: Senator, President, Captain, Admiral, Delegate, Sir, Dame, Professor, Officer, Officer of the Law, Doctor, His Holiness, Her Holiness, General, His Purple Majesty, so on and so on.

3. 
    
   Cap'n Patches McPegleg, Terror of 5 of the 7 Seas

   Choose a first name, something interesting, aka: not Fluffy, Rover, Bruiser, Pookie, Cuddles. Choose something awesome like Zelda, Seasame, Victor, or Roanoke.

4. 
    
   Officer of the Law Finnigan O'Hoolihan

   Choose a last name. Not your own last name either, unless you have an awesome one. Something like Fiddlyseed, Peppermeister, Sneaksfield, Pancakes, O'Hoolihan, or Shinysides.

5. 
    
   Professor Seasame A. Sneaksfield, Purveyor of Miracle Elixirs and Olde Tyme Remedies

   Add further titles or suffixes, like "the third" or "Eorl of East New Brunswick" or "Purveyor of Miracle Elixirs and Olde Tyme Remedies"

Tips & Warnings

• Pick a name that suits your pet. IE: the title Admiral makes no sense if your pet doesnt like the water... use your head.
• It is ok to name your tiny kitten "High Executioner Victor Von Peppermeister, Devourer of Hope" though
• Don't use "Professor Seasame A. Sneaksfield, Purveyor of Miracle Elixirs and Olde Tyme Remedies"... i've already got dibs.