How to Act Like a Pirate

Acting like a pirate isn't just a fun way to irritate your co-workers but is the customary and accepted way of celebrating that distinguished holiday called "National Talk Like a Pirate Day." If you greet every September 19 with unbridled enthusiasm and a hearty "Yaaaar," then read the steps below to learn how to act like a pirate.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Eye patch
• Hat
• Bottle of rum
• Trained parrot
• Ship with cannon

1. Dress the part. Break out that eye patch, hat and peg leg. No self-respecting pirate would be caught dead without them. You get bonus points if your hat has a skull and crossbones on it.
2. Learn the lingo. To really act like a pirate you must talk like one. Phrases like "Ahoy matey," "Shiver me timbers" and the old standby "Aaaargh" are sure to apprise people of your pirate status.
3. Drink rum. Lots and lots of rum. This is even more effective if you call it "Grog" and shout "Yo ho ho" while drinking it.
4. Invest in a parrot. To really act like a pirate you need a parrot. Train him or her to sit on your shoulder and curse at passers-by.
5. Set sail for the high seas. Acting like a pirate isn't all about the fashion sense. You need to go plunder and pillage your way to infamy. Find a ship, a cannon, and some minions to do your bidding and you'll be well on your way to terrorizing the high seas.

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