How to Know it is Time for a Divorce

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By mommynightskye
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When there is no love, it is time to let go

When a relationship truly isn't working, and there is no hope of reconciliation, a divorce can be the healthiest option for everyone concerned. Relationships are complicated, and many couples going through difficult times struggle with whether to divorce or try to work things out. Deciding to divorce is a very painful and personal decision that no one can make for you. Here are some tips to help you know when it is time for a divorce.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

Inner strength
An accurate understanding of your marriage and yourself
Honesty

Step 1

Do you want to tell him all about your day? If your husband is truly your partner, and you have an adventure during the day, you will feel like you "can't wait" to tell him all about it. If you find he is last on your list to share your experiences with, that is a sign that the relationship is in very bad trouble. And if you begin to feel like you need to hide things from him, or that he is keeping things from you, then the situation is that much worse.
Step 2

Do you look forward to seeing her? Even if your marriage is having some problems, if you still have a happy feeling of anticipation as you go home to see your wife, there may be something worth saving in the relationship. If you dread spending time with her in any way, the marriage may be over.
Step 3

Do you enjoy being close to him? Even when your marriage is going through a rocky period, you should still feel "at home" in his arms if your relationship is worth saving. Do you still enjoy the feel of his skin and the sound of his voice? If so, you may want to try and work things out. On the other hand, if you would rather clean a toilet than have sex with him, it may be time to end the marriage.
Step 4

When you are together, do you feel like you are with a friend or an enemy? In a solid marriage, your spouse is also your best friend. Even if you get angry with each other, deep in your heart you know you are a team. If you feel like your spouse is the adversary, and someone you need to defeat in order for things to go your way, it is probably time to start thinking of a divorce.
Step 5

Do you feel safe around him? If you are afraid in your own home, that is a sign of a dangerous relationship which may very well be better off ended. If your husband physically hits you or is intimidating or abusive in other ways (verbally, emotionally, psychologically), you should consider at least separating until he has had extensive counseling.
Step 6

Do you love her? That is one of the most basic yet most important things to consider. If despite whatever troubles you are going through, you truly feel love for her, your marriage may be worth saving. If you find that there is no feeling of love in the marriage, than no amount of counseling can make it worth saving and it is definitely time for a divorce.

Comments

vallain said

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on 3/1/2009 These are valid signs that a marriage is in trouble. It may not be time for a divorce yet. Try marriage counseling as a last resort to see if the relationship can be repaired.