How to Ignore Idiotic Input

Forgive me for saying so, but people are idiots (present company excluded, of course). Without fail, people gossip, shout opinions, correct, criticize, inquire, intrude, debate, debunk, eavesdrop and stick their noses where their noses don’t belong. While it’s great to receive constructive feedback from people who genuinely want to help, too much feedback from too many people can override your natural instincts, stifle your self-esteem and mute your inner guiding voice. In the end, only you know what’s best for you. And in order to fully develop into the unique person you were designed to be, you cannot conform completely to the expectations of others. If you’re feeling sick and tired of constant feedback, let these simple steps help you say: “Butt out, Buddy!”

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• A brain
• Your own opinion
• Potentially, earplugs

How to Ignore Idiotic Input

1. Commiserate with the greats. As Albert Einstein said, “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds." I’m sure that quote would have resonated with Barbra Streisand when Hollywood insiders told her that she would never be famous because of her “big nose.” Luckily she ignored such idiotic input and discovered, “A human being is only interesting if he's in contact with himself. You have got to discover you, what you do, and trust it.” Michael Vanderbyl put it another way in the leaflet entitled "Beauty and Nuance"--“It is important to be plugged into one’s culture, but not to follow wherever it might lead. Even a flawed idea of one’s own is better than a facile adaptation--especially of an unremarkable work.” And this isn’t only a modern-day concern. Even the ancient Greeks understood the danger of placing too much stock in the opinions of others. As the philosopher Epictetus said, “In order to please others, we lose our hold on our life’s purpose.”

2. Value opinions as no more than opinions. Last year I had an article rejected by an editor who suggested I “learn to write” before writing any more articles. This year, that same article landed unchanged in a bigger publication for higher pay and serious accolades. My ex-boyfriend once criticized my favorite jacket. That afternoon, while waiting for my double tall Americano, a man standing behind me in line exclaimed, “Great coat.” Nobody really knows better than anybody else.

3. When confronted with idiotic advice, zip your lip. There’s no need to proceed in a verbal match. Arguing will only polarize the situation and lock the idiot stronger to his or her stance. Don’t waste your energy. Instead counter idiotic advice with a shrug, an eyebrow raise and ambivalence. Your point will have greater impact with silence (even if it’s an internal battle to keep quiet) than with a booming debate.

4. If you must say something, keep it simple. Whenever somebody gives my friend Jay unsolicited advice, he always responds, “Yes, dear.” Then he does exactly as he had planned to do before the advice was given. Try statements like: "thanks for your perspective," "interesting idea" or "I hadn’t thought of that." Then continue about life as you please.

5. Value your opinion. If something doesn’t feel right for you, it isn’t right for you no matter how many people swear up and down that it’s a perfect fit.

6. Become an extra strength, stank neutralizing, fallacy sifting, idiocy identifying filter. Read everything with a critical eye (Yes, even eHow articles written by trusted experts!), accept facts with skepticism and absorb opinions only after careful consideration.

7. Seek perspective from a trusted friend. If you’ve been on the receiving end of idiotic input that you can’t seem to let go, run it by somebody who you know holds your best interest at heart. Talking it through will help you let go and move beyond bad advice and hurtful critiques, so that you can think clearly once again.

8. If all else fails, stick your fingers in your ears and sing, “La. La. La-la-la, la, la, la, la. I. Can’t. Hear. You. La. La. La.”

Tips & Warnings

• Beware of your own idiocy. Just as others don’t always know what’s best for you, you don’t always know what’s best for others. Give advice only when asked for it and even then, don’t go shoving your perspective down another’s throat.

[Maria85]

on 8/5/2008 my dear Amanda thanks for such precious article it really touched my soul, as i used to care for what people telling me and what mamma`s telling me so and she always critically telling me about anything. she made me look very bad in my own eyes.
i`ll start with what you said i`ll start to live my own life in my own way. that`s all

[Maria85]

on 8/5/2008 my dear Amanda thanks for such precious article it really touched my soul, as i used to care for what people telling me and what mamma`s telling me so and she always critically telling me about anything. she made me look very bad in my own eyes.
i`ll start with what you said i`ll start to live my own life in my own way. that`s all

[Maria85]

on 8/5/2008 my dear Amanda thanks for such precious article it really touched my soul, as i used to care for what people telling me and what mamma`s telling me so and she always critically telling me about anything. she made me look very bad in my own eyes.
i`ll start with what you said i`ll start to live my own life in my own way. that`s all

[Maria85]

on 8/5/2008 my dear Amanda thanks for such precious article it really touched my soul, as i used to care for what people telling me and what mamma`s telling me so and she always critically telling me about anything. she made me look very bad in my own eyes.
i`ll start with what you said i`ll start to live my own life in my own way. that`s all

[Schrlau]

on 4/7/2008 Here, Here, But I'm not one of those you mentioned in your opening, LOL, Love the article.