Step1
Some people prefer their sexual adventures with a large side-helping of risk. Having sex nearly in public, or in places where you may get caught, turns a lot of folks on.
But most people will agree that sex is best in a relaxed, stress free atmosphere. That’s why we plan romantic getaways, why we wait until the kids are asleep, why we lock the door.
However, the fast pace of modern life and the many responsibilities we all face conspire to raise our everyday stress levels into the stratosphere. Many people end up feeling too tense to engage in sex or interact with their partners.
But you don’t have to run around all frazzled. Here are a few techniques to help you unwind and get you in the mood.
Step2
Soak away stress
Taking a bath, either with your partner or alone, is a time honored way to relieve stress and prepare for romance. The hot water embraces your naked body, giving you an all-over sensation of well-being. Add a few drops of scented oil, perhaps lavender, said to sooth and comfort both body and mind.
If your bath makes you feel too sleepy for sex, follow it with a cool shower, or, if it’s winter, run outside and roll in the snow.
Step3
Turn down the lights
We go about our business constantly in the glare of overhead bulbs, flashing signs, piercing headlights, over-bright reading lamps. Give your eyes a rest. Light some scented candles, turn off the lights, put on your favorite soothing music. Close your eyes. Just feel.
Step4
Untie knotted muscles
We carry all the stresses and strains of both today and the past around in our muscles. It’s called “muscle memory.” Your muscles try to protect you from both physical pain and emotional pain by tensing up, forming a sort of armor of flesh. To truly enjoy your sexual experiences, you have to break out of this armor somehow.
Massage is one way to relax this muscular armor. Stroke the body, your own or your lover’s, gently however. Deep digging into the muscles may just make them tense up more.
Hot stones are a popular form of therapy that can melt away tension. Soak smooth rounded stones in hot water, until they are warm to the touch, but not too hot. Then smooth them over your partner’s back, shoulders, legs. Hold a hot stone in the palm of the hand, place a stone in the center of the forehead or on the sole of the foot for all-over soothing.
Many couples include some method of relaxation in their foreplay to open their senses and prepare for intimacy. Try a variety of methods to find the best one for you.
Comments
LioraHavilah said
on 3/16/2008 hot stones and aromatherapy work well together.
atmosphere is important.