How to Ask a Friend to Return a Borrowed Item

It's an awkward situation. A friend borrows some item of yours and, after weeks go by, he still hasn't returned it. It's probable that he forgot, but you have to find a way to ask for it back without appearing rude or accusatory.

Instructions

1. Make sure he still has the item. It's embarrassing to think your friend has an item, only to find it at home a few weeks or months later. Search your house before asking.

2. Be direct. Once you establish that your friend still has the item, say, "Fine, but I need it back by such-and-such a date. Can I pick it up by then."

3. Get an exact date you can expect the item back. Don't let the borrower tell you she'll get it back soon or the next time she sees you. Chances are you won't get your item back. Ask your friend to commit to a date or to put it into the mail to you.

4. Accept and forgive your friend if he damaged or lost the item. Accidents happen even to the most responsible people. Don't let one ruined item destroy your friendship.

Tips & Warnings

• Create a sign-in and out sheet if you have many friends borrowing items like movies and books. That way you always know who has what.

• Don't lend things if a friend has problems returning items.