How to Cope With Halloween During Infertility

Halloween can be a challenging time of year for people who are struggling with infertility. Because Halloween is mostly about "trick or treating," it is clearly a children's holiday. Hearing friends talking about their children's Halloween costumes can be painful for those who are struggling with infertility. Here is how to cope with Halloween during infertility.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Halloween costume
• Large candy bowl

1. Focus on the fun of Halloween. Halloween does not have to be just a children's holiday. Many adults get just as excited about the holiday as children do. Halloween is a time in which, for one day, you get to be anything you want to be. Rather than fight it, embrace the day as your own day of fun.

2. Buy a Halloween costume. Get into the spirit of the holiday and dress up as something fun, whether "fun" to you is scary or silly. If your job allows you to dress up on Halloween, then do it. Alternatively, buy yourself some pumpkin earrings, a skull headband or another type of Halloween accessory to join in the fun.

3. Visit a haunted house. Most places have haunted houses that are intended for adults. You might see some teenagers there, but you will not have to worry about running into children. Have some "adult" fun as Halloween approaches.

4. Attend or throw a Halloween party. Talk with your friends about having an adults-only Halloween party. Give away prizes for the most creative costumes. Encourage the attendees to get into the spirit of trying to "one up" one another in creativity.

5. Buy a large Halloween bowl for trick-or-treat candy. Fill the bowl with candy and post a sign instructing each child to help himself to 2 pieces of candy. Do not think about trick-or-treating again for the rest of the night.

6. Spend the night doing something you enjoy with your spouse. Go out for a nice dinner and then see a movie. Remove yourself from all of the trick-or-treating hoopla.

7. Set aside time to grieve. It is normal to think about how disappointed (or devastated) you are to face another Halloween without a child. Give yourself permission to cry, punch pillows and do anything else to help you process your emotions.

Tips & Warnings

• Telling your friends that you are having a rough time will give them the opportunity to help you get through this difficult time of the year. Sometimes our friends will not connect the dots unless we tell them directly that we are hurting.