How to Give Sex Advice to Your Spouse

Giving advice to your spouse is never easy when it comes to personal matters, especially at one of the most vulnerable times--during sex. If there are things that your spouse is doing or not doing that you would like, it should be approached in a delicate way. After all, no one wants to think that they aren’t doing something right, and the subject could be insulting unless you use the tactics listed below.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

1. Ask him for what you want. Instead of telling him what you don’t like, say what it is that you do like in an encouraging way. You could say that you really love when he… or that a certain thing really makes you feel good. Most people love to be told that they are doing things right. Using a positive reinforcement approach is your best bet to getting what you want from him. It will make him feel good knowing that what he is doing pleases you.
2. Show her directly what you want. You can show her by leading her and giving her body language messages to show her what makes you feel good. This doesn't mean to push her to do something that you know that she would never initiate on her own. She may feel like she is being taught something that she doesn't want to learn. Keep it sexy and fun, she will appreciate being part of your enjoyment.
3. Make encouraging movements and sounds. While you are trying to give sex advice to your spouse, use sounds to convey what you want. When he is doing something right with your body, let him know with your sighs to affirm that he is touching you in a way that is pleasurable to you. If there is a different way that you would like him to touch you, your body movements and lack of noise should give him the idea. Moving your body closer for him to continue will let him know when he is making you feel good.
4. Sexually influence her with words. The things that you say during the throes of passion can present an opening for you to give sex advice to your spouse. Adding suggestions during lovemaking will surely add intimacy, as well as enjoyment, while getting your needs satisfied. Talking dirty is a good way to get your ideas across to her as to what you desire, as long as she isn't offended by what you say. Whispering what you want her to do to you in a sexy voice should be enough to spark an erotic notion that she will be happy to oblige.
5. Learn about each other sexually. Discuss the idea of having an evening of educating the other on sexual likes, dislikes and maybe even fantasies that either of you may have. He might have a few ideas of his own to let you know of and will certainly be thankful to know what turns you on the most. This could be your perfect opportunity to explore something new by making this evening somewhat of an experimental date, in order to get to know each others desires and how to fulfill them better.

Tips & Warnings

• Don’t force her to do anything.
• Never use past relationships or partners to describe what you would like for her to do.