Things You'll Need:
- a WOW lexicon, found at the WOW website
- a woman's instincts and determination
- a genuine sense of humor
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Step 1
We are an elite group, ladies, not to be confused with golf widows, football widows, or NASCAR widows whose husbands are literally gone for extended periods of time. Instead, our husbands are present and accounted for, at least in body. In fact, getting them out of that computer chair, on their feet and out the door for some fresh air is akin to bathing a feral cat. Don’t think for a minute that yelling, hurling obscenities, or even crying will get you anywhere. They aren’t hearing you, my friend. The lights are on but no one is home.
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Step 2
Instead of using the usual female charms (and threats) that are normally effective, you will need a whole new bag of tricks to infiltrate a world steeped in jargon that would rival the Navajo military code of World War II. You’ll need to devise a plan that on some level adopts the “if you can’t beat’em, join’em” mentality. Before you panic, I’m not suggesting you try to learn this mayhem yourself; rather, I’m suggesting you learn enough about it to use it to your advantage.
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Step 3
We’ve all heard the sage advice, “keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” In this case, it’s excellent counsel. Forget about trying to have those normal discussions. He’s a WOW junkie, he no longer speaks the language, remember? You, therefore, must learn enough about the terminology to break the language barrier if you really want to get his attention. Let’s assume you are in the mood for some hot romance and he’s begging you for five more minutes so he can level. If you really want to get his attention, try something like, “Hey, you big, strong Warrior. How about a little PVP (player verses player) with your very own Mage?” Without ever having to mentally leave his realm, you have him hook, line and Enchantment.
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Step 4
Look at it this way, ladies, you only have to learn to be more powerful than Elixir of Mongoose, more enticing than Night Elves, and more exciting than the release of The Burning Crusade. How hard can it be? It depends on you and how much power you give the game. It is, after all, just a game. You, on the other hand, are a woman. For a woman, nations have fallen and authors have penned their fortunes. So, if your man tells you he would rather have you than a Level 70 Marksman Bow, he really means it. And you are really blessed, because you are really loved.
Comments
amjames77 said
on 9/7/2009 My husband isn't working at the moment so he gets up at midday, has a cigarette then gets onto warcraft and thats it for the rest of the day. His idea of looking after the kids is giving them chocolate so that they don't disturb him. He finally flops in(to) bed well after 2am and the whole sorry process starts all over again.
Ihatewow said
on 12/8/2008 this game has runined my life!
Gryph said
on 10/15/2008 Awesome article. If only it were around before i adopted the 'if you can't beat them, join them' mentality. Now HE has to beg ME for a little pvp... maybe there's the potential for a Wr.O.W.O.W (widowers of wow)...?
;)
Falcaofury said
on 9/4/2008 FOR THE HORDE!!!
Love this article, christyelle is Kara of Karazhan raid 10 man :P and lucky youre bf can run kara for a week, i can´t when not working, gf in home =/ she don´t even try to play or pay some attention, she loves to have me on her side, watching the stupid TV, grrrrrr but if she ask for some PVP using that call, hehe off computer on the same second.
christyelle said
on 8/13/2008 i have to admit..i had never even heard of this game until after my boyfriend and i had been together for a little while and he disappeared for a week. i found out later he had stayed with a friend "running cara" ?? the whole time. the only way we've found to compromise is that he buys me whatever xbox 360 game i want whenever i ask. sounds spoiled, i know, but it's a lot more fun than watching him talk to a laptop. ("cyclone the druid!!")