How to Walk on New York City Streets

Walking the streets of New York may seem daunting, and in truth it is an art. But never fear! Here are the pointers that will keep you-- faithful tourists and touristas--from feeling too overwhelmed, or from being run over by the hoards of New Yorkers on their way uptown, downtown and even crosstown. Hey, I'm walking here!

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• A Sense of direction
• Walking shoes
• A discrete map
• A steely gaze

1. Taxi dodging should be an Olympic sport. It's all about the flow! Each sidewalk in New York has a unique flow and traffic pattern, not unlike a super-highway. In general, slower moving walkers stay to the right and fast walkers move in and pass to the left. These rules sometimes reversed when on a major flow sidewalk, as in the case of Fifth Avenue, where fast walkers will often step to the outside (and even into the street) in order to pass the tourists and package-laden shoppers. Wherever you are walking, observing and maintaining the flow is king in New York City!
2. Know where you're going. New York is an extremely easy city to navigate once you get the basics down. Get a map, and not one of the multi-fold gigantic things (that's a sure sign you're a tourist) but one of the compact laminated ones you can get at most corner bodegas. Plan your route before you get out on the street.
3. Most of the city's a grid? Who'd a thunk?! Pull over and outta the way! If you do need to read your map or gawk at the giant Coke sign in Times Square, don't do it from the middle of the flow of sidewalk traffic. There is nothing a real New Yorker hates more than being blocked from where they need to walk by a gaggle of tourists planted in the middle of the flow.
4. Intent is king. As humans don't have turn signals (yet), New Yorkers have perfected the art of projecting their intention anywhere from 2 to 10 feet in front of their trajectory. If a New Yorker's intent or actual body motion is already ahead of your intended path, let them go first. Remember Step 1: Maintain the flow. Your path will then smoothly flow behind theirs, and you will avoid collision. It's all very Zen.
   Perfecting this skill will not only maintain the flow, but will help you from being cut off. Your gaze will help in this matter. See the next Step for pointers.
5. The arty shot. Practice your "Steely Gaze." New Yorkers all have a distinct "walking stare": some intense and focused, some loose and peripheral, some blase and without a care in the world. All have one thing in common: if intense enough, they may actually move physical obstacles from your path. Never cross "Steely Gazes" with a New Yorker--this may create a rift in the space-time continuum and cause a giant Marshmallow man to lay waste to most of Manhattan.
6. Cross like you mean it. Crosswalks and lights are suggestions to the pedestrian mind in New York. If there is no oncoming traffic, then take your chances and cross. Especially cross if there is a steady flow of pedestrians that you are a part of. A highly complex quantum physical equation was calculated in recent years that broke down the mathematics of "cross-walk rationale" for New Yorkers--it involved the mass ratio of the pedestrians to the oncoming mass of car traffic--all highly complicated and scientific--but the results were unequivocal: New Yorkers consistently crossed the street whenever they wanted to, physics or no physics.

Tips & Warnings

• Say "Excuse Me!" You'll be surprised how often it'll make getting where you need to go a lot easier.
• New Yorkers are in general nice people. We just like tourists to think we're tough so they'll leave us alone. If you really are lost or need help, don't be afraid to ask. Cops are good for that sort of thing, especially around tourist areas like Times Square. Don't worry, they're used to it.
• If you do have to do the obligatory sightseeing walk around the city, avoid the busiest times of day during the week for street traffic: the morning rush (8 a.m. to 9 a.m.), the lunch hour (11 a.m. to 12 p.m.), and the mad dash home (4:30 p.m. to 6 p.m.). Weekends have their own street traffic busy times, which vary from neighborhood to neighborhood--but count on busy streets all day in the shopping areas, and busy streets at night in the Theater District and Village. Unless you like the crowds. Some folks do. That's why they live here.