How to Explain to A Young Child What a Stranger Is

One of the worst nightmares of a parent is a time when one of their children's safety is being threatened by a stranger. The Internet and television scream daily about the ever-rising crime rate in America. When a child is missing, the media often jumps in and begins analyzing whether or not the missing child had ever been taught exactly how to determine who a stranger might be. The difficult aspect of defining “stranger” to our children is that most of the time the predator is not a stranger. According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, the perpetrator is often a person whom the child considers someone they can trust. So, where do you begin? Let's take a look at how to explain to a young child what a stranger is.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• Time to talk
• Books or magazines with pictures of various types of people
• An open heart

1. Develop an open communication style with your child so that they feel safe talking to you. When a child feels that his or her parent cares and has time for them, they are much more likely to listen to words of guidance. They are also much more likely to respect the words you communicate if they feel you are listening with an open heart.
2. Make sure your child knows that no adult should tell them to keep a secret from you. Many predators depend on a child keeping their secret in order to continue their acts of molestation.
3. When not with you, your child should understand that the buddy system is always best. Most children who are abducted are alone at the time of the kidnapping. According to the Charity Guide website predators actually search for children who are playing alone.
4. Know your community and teach your child about the dangerous people in your community. Programs such as Family Watchdog give parents the information needed to see a picture and description of all sex offenders in a certain distance of their homes. Know that 24 percent of abductions in America are stranger abductions. This leaves a huge number of abductions to family members and acquaintances. Parents need to know who they can trust in their community.
5. Explain that a stranger is anyone your child does not know well. Children are very trusting of adults. Encourage children to be sure you know who they are with at all times and what they are doing during this time.

Tips & Warnings

• Have your child fingerprinted through your local police station.
• Have a photo ID made of your child.
• Develop a neighborhood “kid watch” program.
• Have access to your child's dental records.
• Know the places your child might likely spend free time.
• Share a secret password with your child that anyone should know if they are picking your child up without previous discussions with you.
• Explain to your child that the best defense they have if they are being taken against their will is to make a scene. Scream; kick their legs, anything to get the attention of someone nearby!
• Be sure your child knows his phone number and address at an early age.
• Don't cause your child to become overly fearful about the world and develop mistrust in everyone around them.
• Don't allow your child to stay all night with friends whose families you have never met.
• There are some strangers who can be of help to your child (policemen, store employees and others). Be sure your child understands that fearing everyone is not healthy, but avoiding those who threaten them physically or emotionally is smart.
• If your child does not want to return to a certain home, talk to them about why they feel this way.