How to Avoid an Argument

Have you ever stood toe to toe verbally with someone and afterwards felt really bad for the outburst? There are those who'll tell you that getting things off your chest is the best path to mental health. This may be true, but the method must be socially tenable otherwise your expressed anger will do you and the situation more harm than good. As a whole we must learn to disagree without being violently or verbally disagreeable. This article will help you to cool the flames of anger (the source of most argument) before they burn out of control.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• Patients

How to Avoid an Argument

1. Most serious arguments is with family or friends. Every now and then a co-worker may rub you the wrong way. But by and large the most dangerous and relationship ending arguments is with a loved one. If this is the case one sure fire way to diminish your anger is to remember when this person came to your aid in the past or shared a special memory with you. If it is a spouse or girlfriend or boyfriend remember when you first met and how special this person was to you. These are the things our anger hinds from us in an argument. Anger can never dispel anger only love can do that.
2. A soft calm voice will work wonders to control a hostel situation, even a gentle smile at the right time will soon turn the argument to a discussion.
3. In an argument people become very defensive so avoid statements like "You never listen" or "You never ...." These statements would throw anyone over the edge. Remove the finger pointing phase of "You" from every argument. It only fuels the flames and the person with whom you are talking has stop listening to you and is focusing on their own anger. Use statements like, "It would be wonderful if we could listen to one another right now." Take the spot light off of them and put it where it belongs on the problem. "Never" statements is the Devils best weapon in destroying relationships. Get it out of the discussion, because if you were to honestly search your heart you know it's not true. If you were to employ these simple rules you will avoid most arguments.

Tips & Warnings

• Smiling and a soft tone is the key to avoiding many arguments, be wise and use them whenever possible.
• No "You" or "Never" statements should be use during any discussion.