How to Deal With a Defensive Young Boss

Throughout my years of experience working in the culinary field, I have encountered many difficult and defensive young bosses. They can be stubborn, full of attitude, inexperience and sophomoric; this certainly impacts the team dynamic and positive work environment. In order to preserve my morale at work successfully, I follow these simple steps to deal with defensive young bosses.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Notepad and Pen
• Courage
• Composure
• Tact

1. If this is in regards to young bosses who treats his/her team inappropriately, make sure to document the occasions and specific details of their action. This can be important to provide some context later on. Young defensive bosses will try to get out of blame if you do not have facts to back up your accusations. In the end, the more prepared you are, the better. This act of documenting can also play a role in releasing some of your frustration/anger. Overall a positive tool!
2. If situation continues to worsen even after you give it some time: Set up a time to meet with your boss' supervisor to seek some advice. Often time, it can be intimidating to confront your direct supervisor first. Whereas, his/her supervisor can have a slight advantage when it comes to effective confrontation and making a difference in behavioral change. Your supervisor will be forced to yield to his or her supervisor's suggestion. If he/she has no supervisor, proceed to next step
3. Ask your supervisor to set up a one-on-one meeting with you discussing team work flow optimization and performance expectations. Firstly, touch on how you want to discuss your performance as a team member; perfect way to segment to talking about his/her performance as a team leader. Start off with the positive and then progress to areas of improvements tactfully. Use a lot of "I" statements such as "I feel that" and "I believe". Give him/her room to talk and give constructive comments rather than listing out all their flaws blow by blow. At this point, he/she may be defensive about your accusations, however do not feel intimidated. Stand strong with your proofs you have documented. Feel free to acknowledge his/her perspectives, however do not be shaken to offer tactful advice on how his/her behavior can improve the overall working environment. Young bosses can be a little stubborn when it comes to taking advice, however most of them are open to learn from their mistakes and grow (believe it or not). Never burn bridges and undermine their opinions. This can really hurt your relationship more. End your discussion with an optimistic message of growth and positive closure. Always emphasis that the performance discussion is nothing personal and that you want both parties to benefit.
4. Do a follow up meeting with your supervisor privately a week later to discuss progress. Give him/her positive encouragement for improvements and provide honest feedbacks on lack of improvements.

Tips & Warnings

• A negative working experience is a chapter of positive new learnings
• Do not raise voice or blow up at your boss, while threatening to quit. This is a form of weakness. Dealing with the issue at hand, instead of running away and blowing up in anger will strengthen you and give you new insights on working with challenging team dynamics