How to Make It To Six Months Married

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You don’t want to believe that your life is slipping into a tired cliché, but now that you are married and the honeymoon is over, you have found that just what everyone has always told you, is, in fact true. Now is when the work begins. And yes, despite the fact that you have lived together prior to marriage; maybe for years and years or maybe just for the occasional weekend; and even though you think you have got your Mack on, everything IS really different and things HAVE irrevocably changed. So before you go and pull that “big D” card, you need to take a breath and figure out how you got to this point and how you can keep going. If you are not yet married, don’t let this pithy article scare you. Just read on.

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Instructions

Difficulty: Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

patience
partner
marriage
time
energy

How to Make It To Six Months Married

Step1

Listen: This one is a doozy. Well, they all are. But this one is the overarching theme to your life. You need to listen to your husband or wife. If they say something and they notate that it is important or even if it is just in passing conversation but this thing is mentioned with EMPHASIS; and you forget it…? Oh boy! More to the point this is the person you have stated before friends, family, and God that you want to spend the rest of your life with. I don’t remember the exact words, but “love,” “honor,” and “cherish” come in there somewhere. So how can you cherish someone you won’t even listen to?

Step2

Respond: Listening alone is not enough. You need to respond to them when they’ve said something; equally important, you need to pull yourself away from NASCAR (or “What Not To Wear”) and be there for them when they need you. Whatever the reason, if they need you, that’s it. You have exchanged a vow to place this person above all others, forever; not “during the commercial.”

Step3

Love: If there is no hugs and kisses (and meals served in nothing more than an apron; or eaten off of one another) from time to time then things will get really boring really quick. And you know what they say about “wandering eyes” right?

Step4

Laugh: America is in a war. Wall Street is in a recession. Democrats are fighting Democrats; Republicans are fighting Republicans (and they’re supposed to be the figurehead of our face to the world?) Wages are stagnant. People are busier than ever. There’s more and more noise. You’re reading this article! How good can life be for any of us? If you can’t laugh and enjoy those blessed few moments of peace and solitude with your life partner, well…

Step5

Talk: Starting with listen and ending with talk is appropriate. Because even though relationships are hard, marriage is hard, coping is hard, change is hard; real life doesn’t stop just because you have all these other things. And that’s really what being married is all about. Having that one person who you can tell anything to; absolutely. When we start to hide truths from our spouse that is when things get really messy. So yes, listening, responding, loving, and laughing are all important. But if there are major things going on in your life that you can’t talk to your spouse about; that’s just got DISASTER spelled all over it.