How To

How to Funnel a Beer

Member
By doommarine3
User-Submitted Article
(5 Ratings)
Featured here is a mighty weapon of mass beer destruction.
Featured here is a mighty weapon of mass beer destruction.

This article explains how to funnel a beer with a beer funnel aka beer bong.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy
Instructions

Things You'll Need:

  • Beer Funnel
  • Beer
  • Yourself
  • Thirst for beer yum!
  1. Step 1
    Displaying the weapons of funneling.
    Displaying the weapons of funneling.

    Acquire a proper beer funnel (also known as a beer bong)
    for more information see our site www.howtofunnelabeer.com

  2. Step 2
    Natties, cheap but effective.
    Natties, cheap but effective.

    Acquire beer that works well in a funnel. Light beers are best.

  3. Step 3
    Plug the funnel with your thumb!!
    Plug the funnel with your thumb!!

    Close the valve on the funnel or kink the funnel so it doesn't go straight through to the ground or someone's shirt or pants

  4. Step 4
    Dont pour to fast.. and pour on the edge not in the center!
    Dont pour to fast.. and pour on the edge not in the center!

    Pour the beer slowly on the edge of the funnel with the whole beer can over the funnel so it doesn't spill out. Slowly pouring is the key to keeping foam to sane levels.

  5. Step 5

    Once the can is empty, allow the beer to settle in the hose so there is no foam. Foam is your ENEMY!

  6. Step 6
    Burping keeps you from drinking air yuck..
    Burping keeps you from drinking air yuck..

    Now that the beer is settled, you can now 'burp' the beer bong (if you don't have a valve). To do this, just slowly release the kink to let the beer rise to the end of the tube. When it nears the top, kink the hose to keep it from overflowing.

  7. Step 7
    Don't drench yourself keep the funnel plugged.
    Don't drench yourself keep the funnel plugged.

    Now plug the hose with your tongue and get into position. The classic beer funnel position is the one leg kneel, but thats not the only way to funnel. Use your imagination! There are all sorts of cool ways to funnel a beer like the 2nd-floor funnel, the top-of-car funnel, or the porch funnel.

  8. Step 8
    Bombs away!
    Bombs away!

    When you are ready, unplug the hose and raise the funnel as high as possible. If you have friends nearby, get them to raise it up.

    DO NOT SUCK! Let the beer flow into your stomach, but remember to swallow. A whole beer should go in 2-3 gulps (Pro), 4 gulps (Amateur), or 5 or more (Beginner).

  9. Step 9
    A nice belch allows you to line em up.
    A nice belch allows you to line em up.

    You're done! But remember...

  10. Step 10
    Ashley Skyy on the funnel!
    Ashley Skyy on the funnel!

    Don't forget to let the girls funnel too!

Tips & Warnings
  • Funnel light beers for maximum drinking fun
  • Longer hoses usually take a kneeling stance and more people to hold the funnel
  • Tall people are great funnel holders
  • DO NOT SUCK just gulp it down as it falls into your beer gut
  • Beer cans may litter your domain after a night with a nice funnel beware.

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