How to Choose a Baby's Last Name

Choosing a last name for a baby is easy if both parents have the same last name. However, it's become more common for a baby to have parents with different last names. Perhaps the parents are unmarried; or perhaps they each chose to keep their own name after marriage. Whatever the case, when parents have different last names, they'll need to choose a last name for their child. Read on to learn how to make this decision.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Discuss honestly what the two of you want. If it matters much more for one of you than the other to pass on your last name, then that might be the best choice. If one of you hates the concept of hyphenating your names, you'll have to decide on something else.

2. Explore the possibility of using each of your last names. Write out the baby's two potential names. If one simply sounds much better than the other, that might be your choice. Or if one last name causes undesirable initials, you may be able to eliminate that choice.

3. Explore the possibility of hyphenation. If your names are very long or sound awkward together, this might not be the best option. Write the hyphenated name out both ways (Cooper-Smith, Smith-Cooper) and see which sounds better with the rest of the name and is easier to say.

4. Consider creating a new last name by combining your names together in a desirable way. The advantage of this is that your child won't have to deal with hyphenation but will have parts of both of your names. The disadvantage is that this is bound to cause bureaucratic confusion.

5. Consider using one of your names as a middle name. You can do this by using a last name as the only middle name (Sarah Cooper Smith) or by using it as a second middle name (Sarah Marie Cooper Smith).

6. Consider using one of the last names as the child's first name. Sex and the City fans will be familiar with this option, as the characters Miranda Hobbes and Steve Brady had a baby named Brady Hobbes

Tips & Warnings

• The more "traditional" hyphenation choice is to place the woman's last name first before the man's.
• Expect that upon occasion, people will get your child's name wrong. Occasionally, this may be the result of a disapproving relative, but usually it's just that people don't know. Take these kinds of mistakes in stride, as it isn't worth the energy to get upset.
• Consider giving the child one last name if it's a boy and the other last name if its a girl.
• Expect unwanted advice about this matter, and politely ignore it. Your child's name is no one else's business.
• If you hyphenate, expect repeated jokes about how your child will marry someone else with a hyphenated name and will wind up with a name like Smith-Cooper-Robertson-Williams. The jokester will be under the false impression that this is an original insight; but everyone with a hyphenated name has heard comments like this repeatedly. Ignore it. Know that your hyphenated child will have the sense to do what he or she wants upon marriage.