How to Let People Know You've Kept Your Last Name

All things considered, it's easier to keep your last name when you get married than to change it. You don't have to worry about changing official documents or other bureaucratic hassles. However, since most women take their husband's names, many people will assume you've changed yours. If you've kept your maiden name, here's how to let people know.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Ask your officiant to announce it during your ceremony. The officiant can either announce it directly, or end the ceremony with a statement such as, "Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time as a married couple, Mr. Jeffrey Goldberg and Ms. Amanda Green."

2. Place an announcement in your wedding program. You can include it as a part of your address information. Include a statement such as, "Please keep in touch! We will be keeping our last names. Our address is: Jeffrey Goldberg and Amanda Green, 2965 Linden Avenue..."

3. Put your names on personalized wedding favors.

4. Put your names on personalized wedding thank-you cards. The front of the card can read something to the effect of, "Thank you kindly from Jeffrey Goldberg and Amanda Green!"

5. Get personalized address labels that list both of your names.

6. Introduce yourself with your first and last names. When meeting a friend, colleague, or relative, say something like, "Hi, I'm Amanda Green, Jeffrey's wife."

7. Use a light tone and some humor when correcting people about your name. People get defensive about this kind of thing. Say something like, "Actually, my name is Jeffrey Goldberg. Amanda let me keep my name."

Tips & Warnings

• Inevitably, people will call the woman by her husband's last name, either because they don't know or (less often) because they don't approve. Expect to get wedding invitations and holiday cards addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. Jeffrey Goldberg." It's not worth the energy to get upset. Correct people politely if appropriate, and forget about it.
• Don't let people who disapprove get you down. Your name is nobody else's business.

[eclecticprof]

on 4/26/2009 I enjoyed this article! Thanks for sharing...it's hard to swim upstream in any culture. But the tide is changing.