How to Avoid Going to a Family Function

One of the most traditional family outings is the infamous family gathering or family reunion. Quite often families will set up these family functions by planning them far in advance. Many a complaint has been offered as to why people abhor attending such family functions. So to help you get out of the next family function that you are suppose to attend, try these four different tricks.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Ability to lie with a straight face
• Need or want to avoid the family function
• Family function to attend
• Personal time

How to Avoid Going to a Family Function

1. Lose the RSVP form and avoid returning phone calls or emails. Typically, most organized family functions will have RSVPs sent out by one of the organizing members as well as a slew of phone calls to confirm. You can easily play this off by casually losing the RSVP form and by not returning any of the messages until after the event has already taken place.
2. Use the business-trip excuse model. This is the most classic way to get out of a family function. Your RSVP should read: "Sorry I would love to attend, but unfortunately I will be out of town on business during the days that the event takes place. I look forward to catching up with everybody at the next family function."
3. Call in sick, no doctor’s note required. You RSVP and then call in or better yet email in about a day or so before the event. You suddenly have contracted a nasty flu strain, and do not want to get everybody else sick; even though you would love to attend with a 105-degree fever.
4. Send your spouse, armed with a good excuse. If your spouse is willing to let you off the hook or perhaps they owe you a favor, you can always send her in your stead. Just make sure the excuse is down pat, so neither of you slip up and let on at a later time.

Tips & Warnings

• The better your excuse is, the less likely that people in your family will question why you are not present.
• Avoiding too many family functions could ostracize you from the family; only do this every so often.