How to Not Hate Your Wife
She pisses you off to no end and you think it's over. Try these ideas before calling it quits.
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Instructions
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1
Take some time off.
Sometimes you just need to miss her to realize that you can't live without her. Take a long business trip, a vacation to visit friends or just rent another apartment for a month.
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2
Remember the reasons you married her.
Write these down in a list. Remember how cute her laugh is, how caring she is, and how hard you fell in love with her.
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3
Start anew.
Start dating her again. If you have to, move to an apartment and date. Take her out and take her home at night. Don't have sex right away and dont see her more than once or twice a week to start. Dating can help you rekindle that flame.
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4
Without getting angry. Think about what makes you mad.
Write down what exactly it is that makes you upset with her. You may come to find that a lot of "her" problems are actually your problems. You may be really stressed at work or because of the kids, and her always burning dinner may not be why you're getting so pissed.
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5
Go to therapy by yourself.
Or bounce ideas off of a close friend. Couples therapy will probably make you hold things back, or worse, be honest and say things to hurt her that don't need to be said. By going alone, you can be completely honest and discuss your problems without worrying about her.
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6
Make sure you are happy.
If you're not happy you will take it out on your spouse. You need to have good friends, spend time with them and have a hobby or two that is all your own. Making yourself happy is your responsibilty to yourself and your marraige. It's not her job to make you happy.
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7
Get some "Me" time.
Going off the last idea, spend more time with yourself. If you go from home to work back to home everyday you will get sick of seeing her, no matter how much you love her. Fill up your schedule with more time for yourself and explain to her that it's important for both of your happiness that you spend more time alone or with your friends. She will probably appreciate this time as well.
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8
Calmly discuss issues.
Yelling won't get you anywhere. Neither will comparing her to her mother or complaining about her friends. That is her support network and it's the last place you want to attack. Start with easy obstacles like suggesting you eat out more or buy microwave dinners since the food is always burnt. Remember to follow up every negative with something positive, and never lose your cool.
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Comments
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rssllspgsguy
Apr 20, 2009
I will take these things into consideration. My wife has been getting on my ever loving nerves as of late. She quit her job last year, that alone I didn't like, we are covered in bills. That is a major factor in MY stress level. The thing is she promised me she would find another job....that was march 08 this is APRIL 09. I'm no expert...but if you really wanted a job, you could have something by now, even a Mcdonalds. The money isn't all of the problems stressing me. She is around me EVERY waking moment that I'm not at work. I love her, but we were so much happier when she worked, because I work nights, she works days. We had time apart. We really need it. The only problem is that the more I try to pull back, the more she pulls me closer. I had mentioned getting out, and she is all like "you don't want to be around me" and I explain yes, but I need some space. Then she says ok, but you -
bergersworth
Feb 10, 2008
Thank you for writing this. I've been at the "boiling point" for the past few weeks. It is so overwhelming. I am going to try these suggestions. I can't believe how miserable life can be when marriage is bad.
