How To Do Just About Everything
By LuLu12
Rate: (23 Ratings)
Do not expect her to care for you. She will not do it. No matter what you buy her, it will make no difference. She will watch and listen to everything you say and will take it the wrong way. Go through the grieving process. Don't constantly ask yourself, "what have I done wrong?" There isn't an answer. You have entered the world of the women of today. These people are controlling freaks who must have things their way and you are not included. If you have a son, be prepared to have this woman use every means necessary to get you totally out of your son's life. She will do anything. She will succeed and then brag about it to others, especially on message boards. She will make your son see you in a different light. He will end up not liking you because this little selfish twit will nit pick and dissect everything you do. Say goodbye to your son immediately after the wedding...she will be sweet as sugar before the wedding..don't fall for it. She's trying to get him. Don't try to be nice, just be cordial. Don't go through years of "why, why why?" Just let your son go and back off. No matter what you do, you will be called, "Narcissistic, manipulative and needy". If you call, you're calling too much. If you don't call, you're not interested. So forget him. Say goodbye. She will only deal with her own parents and your son will also. They will view him as the best guy on earth. He will be too because you raised him. She does not want you or your family. Don't have a son. This situation will come around to your Daughter in law if she has a son. So, just back off, lay low and live to see the heartbreak when it falls on her.
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Comments
LuLu12 said
on 10/5/2008 Dear Paugh,
Your comment got cut off so I didn't see the rest of what happened. I can guess, though. Same story as the rest of us just packaged a little differently.
Just hang on if you can. I hope you haven't been "CUT OFF" as the women say today.
If you have, all you can do is just stay cut off. If there are children, send cards with a little money in them to the kids.
The kids didn't have anything to do with it.
We've all been there and it seems like the parents who have been the worst, seem to get the most.
I think this is because they have to try harder to get their love.
We're just there, trying to find a place to fit in.
Same thing happened to us. Stay strong...stay with us...she is probably using you as a scapegoat for the childhood she had.
paughwoosh said
on 10/5/2008 My DIL from hell-where to begin. The engagement, I gave my son the ring so he could ask her (a family heirloom). She lost it (fell asleep and it came off her finger in their car and they can't find it). The wedding, I was not included in anything; while the mother (who left her son at the age of 2 and walked away) was included in everything; even the wedding ceremony. We (my husband and I) were placed in a location where nothing could be seen. By the end of the reception, our entire family was sitting in chairs watching from afar. Then on their way back home from the honeymoon, they stop by because they had heard that I "had a problem" with the way things were handled. By the end of the discussion, she was the victim and I was the bad guy. The on Easter this year, our son comes to Easter by himself and as we are leaving says that he wants to come talk to us. He came to tell us that
LuLu12 said
on 10/1/2008 Dear Bizworkingmom,
Your comment to hurting workingmoms here is below the belt. Most of us sacrificed everything we had and more to just at least have a family.
Is that what you are doing? I assume you have kids? Is your home perfect? Nobody's is...you might find in your critical remarks that you come across in later life, a daughter in law who is so threatened by you and the home you have that she makes your son choose between you or them.
Be sure, your hurtful remarks to us will come back to you. What you have said to us has already been set in stone to happen to you.
No home is perfect, ours sure wasn't but we didn't deserve this. Be careful.
bizworkingmom said
on 10/1/2008 It's amazing how no MIL is ever willing to take any responsiblity for anything. Your DILs are not clones of you. They come from a different life and if your son chose them maybe he likes they way they do things. If your sons are having issues with their siblings why not taking a very painful look at reality, maybe there were problems all along and you are just deflecting it onto your daughter in law. that's not fair. Yes, some people are sick and have an agenda but not every situation warrants full blame on your DIL. come on, get over it.
LuLu12 said
on 9/26/2008 Mary Jo,
It's such a shame that these pages cut off our comments so we can't get the whole story.
Writing very short sentences with paragraphs in between is the only thing I can see that helps.
I know what those waves of sadness feel like. They do come and go. Your one big happy family sounds exactly like me.
I hate to hear about anyone going through this. Mine has been going on for 14 years. Each hurtful thing she does sends our son farther away from us.
He won't even return his brother's phone calls. She has managed to tear even that relationship apart.
There is no end to her ability to destroy. I have tried everything probably exactly like you. No deal.
She wants all family members out. Oh my God! I wish I'd never had him to lose him like this.
I would have been the best person on earth to her.
She wouldn't have even had to love me. She could have only t