How to Ask Him to Get a Vasectomy

Pregnancy and labor put a tremendous toll on a woman’s body only to leave her with more worries once she feels she is finished with having children. Birth control can continue the burden with spotting, weight gain, headaches and many other side effects. There is always the option to go under the knife and have a tubal ligation (tubes tied), but some women are left with feeling enough is enough. This is when a vasectomy becomes a viable option. However, most men are not eager to go under the knife themselves and may need a bit of coaxing and guidance to follow through.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

Things You’ll Need:

• A list of urologists who are in-network with his insurance company
• Vasectomy, tubal ligation and birth control literature

1. Before you even begin to discuss birth control methods with him sit down for a long talk about children. Be sure he is absolutely ready to quit having children. You do not want him resenting you if he decides to do it and regrets it later.
2. Tell him that you are trying to decide on a method of birth control and would like his input.
3. Educate him on the side effects using the literature on birth control and tubal ligation. Let him know that some birth control methods have risk of heart attack, blood clotting and stroke. You should also have a strong argument against tubal ligation. This is a good time to point out all the work you have contributed during pregnancy and labor.
4. Tell him you aren’t comfortable with the possible side effects of birth control or a tubal ligation and ask him if he would be open to making a contribution to the relationship.
5. Present him with the vasectomy literature and assure him that there is little to no pain involved in the procedure. (There is however some discomfort).
6. Ask him to think about it for a few days and then set a time to discuss it again.
7. Ask him to talk with a trained urologist before he makes up his mind and make the appointment for him if he is still reluctant to get the procedure. Also, ask for help from his male friends who have had the procedure and are grateful.

Tips & Warnings

• If he decides against a vasectomy, support and respect his decision and find another solution together.