How to Audition For "Flava of Love"

He's cool. He's suave. He wears golden grills! He's Flava Flav and he's lookin for love. If you're a hot mama who thinks you're just what "The Man" is lookin' for, then read on about how to audition for his lookin' for love show, "The Flavor of Love".

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Push-up bra
• Super mini skirt or hot pants
• Loads of makeup
• Hair weave and/or extensions
• Ability to cuss a blue streak
• Video camera

1. Your competition Flav loves his women hot, sexy and a little skanky, so put on your shortest, tightest skirt, stuff your bra until your cleavage is ready to explode, tousle your hair weave until the hair is flowing seductively around your shoulders, pile on the mascara and lip gloss and put on your 4-inch stilettos. SEX IT UP! Then assess your look in the mirror. If you feel you're looking waaay too sleazy, well then, congratulations, sistah you're ready to make your video!
2. Deelishis-Flava's chosen lady last year Now practice in the front of a mirror. Try doing a mini strip tease, practice flashing your breasts or dry humping the chair. Remember, Flava likes his women to be as outrageous and crazy as possible.
3. The famous New York Now you're ready to make your video. When you make your video, tell Flav how much you love him, how much you need him, how much you're just dying to be with him! Say the most seductive, wild, crazy thing as possible. Just pour on the love and make Flav feel like he won't be able to live without you!
4. Pumkin Now you're ready to mail your tape. Send your tape to: Flava of Love Casting, c/o VH1, 1515 Broadway, New York, NY 10036. To make your package stand out more, why not spray it with perfume and put a lipstick mark on it.
5. Flava & Brigitte Nielsen and their matching grills! Now wait to hear if you're one of the lucky ladies who will vie for Flava's heart. If you're one of the lucky ones chosen for the show, you might just be the girl that sweeps him off his feet and who he gives his matching golden grill to!

Tips & Warnings

• In your video, never mention anything about what a great singer or performer you are. After getting burned several times, Flav is very suspicious of women who are only using his show as a vehicle to further their careers.
• Don't bother applying if you've done porno, posed naked in a magazine or if you're a stripper. While Flav loves the skanky, sleazy look, he is looking for a decent woman.
• If you are lucky enough to make it on the show, whatever you do, don't spit!