How to Deal with a Jerk at Work

Every workplace has a certain quota of jerks that like to make other people unhappy, because they are either miserable themselves or insecure. Here are some ideas on how to cope with your particular dope.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Patience
• Earphones
• IPod or CD player

1. Ignore her. If possible, act as if she is invisible. At first, she will try even harder to get your attention and distract you from your work. However, she will tire of this quickly and move on to her next victim.
2. Earphones were made just for people like him. Use them. If you cannot ignore him because he is in the next cubicle, rev up your Ipod and enjoy your favorite tunes. If needed, try earplugs.
3. Some folks cannot listen to music, because they work primarily on the phone, like customer-service representatives. In your case, use an earplug in the other ear and use a headset for your calls. This is better for you if you’re on the phone a lot, saving your arm, shoulder and neck from undo strain.
4. Try to avoid inviting Mr. Jerk to any office meetings that you coordinate or manage. If he’s required to attend, notify him separately and verbally, directing him to go to the wrong building or meeting room. When he shows up ten minutes late, he will at least get in trouble with his boss for his tardiness.
5. In some companies, if you’re more than five minutes late for a meeting, you are excluded from it. The problem with this practice is that all your dutiful employees are in the meeting, while all your jerks are wandering the halls. If they happen to find each other, your company could suffer major losses while they are “in charge”.
6. If all else fails, get him fired. Sneak into his cubicle while he is at lunch. Scatter inappropriate magazines all around the room. On his computer, pull up the worst porn site you can reach after you have sent an AIM from him to his boss requesting a meeting asap. Then sit back and watch the fun unfold.

Tips & Warnings

• Of course, you're really not going to get anyone fired, but it is fun to think about sometimes.
• Remember, however, no matter where you work, there are going to be jerks. Get used to it or think about finding a job where you can work from home. Then the biggest jerk around will be you!

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