How to Be Random

Some people have the gift of randomness. They come and go as they please, pepper conversations with comments that came straight out of left field and have an interesting sense of style. They also have a lot of fun and give a new meaning to the word spontaneous.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Act disengaged from social situations. Stand with a group of people, but appear to be miles away. Look out the window, examine house plants and don't immediately answer when someone talks to you. Project a flighty air to appear random without being rude.
2. Expand your vocabulary to include old or rarely used words. Learn slang from the turn of the century and use it liberally. Identify a signature word and work it into nearly every sentence. Example: "My dinner tastes like wombat" or "That guy is such a wombat."
3. Be spontaneous, and act as though what you are doing is not important. Get up in the middle of a study session and announce that you are going to play ping-pong. Encourage others to join you to make them feel random too. Spontaneity can be rehearsed privately so it appears natural when you do it around others.
4. Go off on tangents. Take conversations into uncharted territory with the aid of a long and detailed description of a mundane act.
5. Wear strange clothing. Galoshes make an excellent fashion statement for the random. Find old and unfashionable pieces at thrift stores and pair them with otherwise trendy outfits. Make a quirky piece of apparel your signature.

Tips & Warnings

• Of course, if you comsciously follow these steps to plan your behavior, you won't be random. To be random, follow your impulses (as long as they are legal).