How to Improve Your Social Skills and Make Friends
A solid social life and close friends can do a lot to enhance your life, whether you want to share lighthearted laughter or divulge your deepest secrets. For some introverted people, though, meeting new people and making friends isn't that easy. Work on cultivating your social skills to establish strong bonds with people you appreciate and respect.
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Things You'll Need
- Confidence
- Desire to improve your social and other personal skills
- Time and patience to practice these skills
Instructions
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Listen. When you find yourself in social situations, do a lot of listening. When someone else speaks, show him you care and you find what he says to be engaging. By listening, you express you are interested in getting to know him as a person. Show him you are open to him by posing detailed questions and establishing eye contact.
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Work on your body language. Increase your social skills by assessing how you come across to other people. Do you seem aloof and unapproachable? If you want to make friends, make the effort to be friendly. When frowning and crossing your arms in the corner of the room, you send the signal you want others to stay away. Keep a relaxed posture, smile and move toward the center of the conversations. Ask trusted friends what you can do to make yourself more open.
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Talk to people you already know. Let your inner circle (including old pals and family members) know you want to expand your social circle and make new friends. For example, your aunt can introduce you to someone your age range from her workplace. Your oldest friend from elementary school can organize a gathering to meet several acquaintances who work in a similar field as you. If other people aren't aware you want to socialize and make new friends, they cannot help you.
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Improve your social skills by breaking the ice with new people. One way to do this is by paying others compliments. Tell someone reading your favorite novel that she has great taste in literature. At an event, tell the person sitting by you that you love her shoes. However, don't compliment others for the sake of it; be sincere and authentic.
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Sign up for some new activities. Find situations where you can meet and interact with new people. For example, enroll in a photography course at the local community college. Volunteer at a battered woman's shelter or join a local volleyball club. If you surround yourself with new people, talking to them will become natural.
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Laugh more. Allow other people to see your fun-loving side.People are drawn to people who possess strong senses of humor. Laughing when another person cracks a joke or tells a hilarious story indicates you enjoy his company too.
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Relax. The calmer you are, the easier it is for you to meet and talk to new people. When someone smiles at you, it is a sign for you to say "hello."
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Tips & Warnings
Be yourself. Other people are drawn to honest and genuine individuals. Do not try to conform to who you think other people want you to be -- people can detect phoniness.
Developing your social skills takes time, patience and practice. Do not be afraid to make mistakes and make the effort. In time it will pay off.
References
- Beliefnet: 13 Ways to Make Friends
- "Psychology Today"; How Do I Make New Friends?; Hana Estroff Marano; March 2007
- Huffington Post; Hey Ladies! 10 Tips to Make New Friends; Rachel Bertsche; October 2010
- "Psychology Today"; Talking to Strangers (And Other Things That Bring Luck); Christine L. Carter; March 2010
- Mount State Centers for Independing Living: Social Skills
- Photo Credit Comstock Images/Comstock/Getty Images
