How to Deal With a Bully at Work

Work bullies are typically insecure, and want to make you look small so they can look bigger. These situations can be very tricky, as you will look bad if you react the way you want to and they will win. Here's how to keep your cool and fight the bully with level-headed tactics.

Instructions

Difficulty: Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• PC and email program
• MP3 player with calming music
• Mirror

1. Bullies like to put down their victims publically, so that they will respond in anger and look like the bad guy. The first thing to remember is to keep your cool no matter what. Practice keeping your cool in front of a mirror so that you have a credible poker face. Take a walk if you have to, and listen to calming music so that you are composed when you return.
2. Try to anticipate what the bully will say, and practice some sharp yet funny comebacks in front of your mirror. Your goal is to take the brunt of the joke off yourself and throw it back to the bully.
3. If your work is being unfairly criticized, rally support from those close to you who will promote your work. Do so quietly, yet effectively.
4. If your bully drops the ball on something, send a polite email requesting him to fix it and "accidentally" hit reply-all on an earlier email, so that others notice.
5. Make sure that your own conduct and work are above reproach at all times.
6. If the bully's tactics continue, but are only practiced in front of peers and not upper management, you may want to have a talk with your boss or others in a position to help. Do so only as a last resort, as you don't want to look like the weaker player.

Tips & Warnings

• It always pays to have a strong network. Go to lunch with coworkers and out for drinks after work. You will learn many things you otherwise wouldn't know.
• Socialize with industry players outside your company. Here you will often learn choice tidbits about your bully that you can happen to drop at opportune times.
• Never get into email wars with anyone. Many have been fired over this throughout the years.
• Don't respond to the bully by lowering yourself to his level. It is your goal to stay above his tactics, and come out the good guy.

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