How to Survive Adult Children Living with Parents

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By Kat Yares
eHow Community Member

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Boomerang children seem to be the norm these days. These are the kids that go off to college or out on their own only to return home in a few years unable to make it in the real world. What’s a parent to do? It’s hard to turn your children away. The best thing a parent can do is making them understand that they are adults now and the rules have changed.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

Step 1

Establish the ground rules before your adult child moves in. Make it very clear that you have your own life and are not going to cater to their whims. They are not children anymore and do not need Mommy and Daddy to do for them.
Step 2

Charge rent, even if it is a nominal amount. If the adult child is without or between jobs, barter labor for room and board. Once they begin to realize there is no free ride at home any longer, the faster they will attempt to get on their own two feet again.
Step 3

Let the adult child fend for himself. This includes cooking, laundry and other chores. It’s OK to include enough for the child when you are cooking dinner for everyone, but don’t cook special foods just because the adult child likes it.
Step 4

Force the issue of getting a job; any job. Parents of adult children should not have to purchase toiletries and other incidentals for adult children.
Step 5

Don’t let resentments build. If you feel your child is out of line, let her know it. Explain that you are the one doing the favor and that appreciation is expected.

Comments

lired said

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on 1/12/2009 i started a blog as the adult child who moved home somewhat unexpectedly...

www.backwhereistartedfrom.com

my parents and sister have helped amuse the hell out of me while here.

bluewatersgirl said

on 10/18/2008 Where's the article helping the adult children who have moved back into their parents home because it is MUTUALLY beneficial? I am an adult child, I do not have to live in my mothers home. But she is getting on in age, I keep up the yard and do the "physical" stuff around the house. Yes, I get a break on rent, and she is very generous when it comes to "treats". But I gave up my own apartment (To live in her basement) and find now that I have to "co-parent" my 9 year old son with her. I take full responsibility for this decision, It truly benefits us both, but in no way is she getting the short end of the stick, it is my lifestyle that has changed. At times I feel like I am 15 again. YUCK! LOL.