How to Be an Assertive Bride Without Being a Bridezilla

Everyone hates a Bridezilla--you know, the woman who thinks she's a princess and demands that the world revolves around the planning of her special day. But that doesn't mean that if you speak your mind during the wedding planning process, you're a Bridezilla. A wedding is a significant event, and an expensive one, so there's nothing wrong with making sure everything is as it should be.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

1. Make sure the groom is doing his fair share of the work. Do not let him hide behind the mythology that it's "the bride's day," so he can let you run all the errands. There's nothing wrong with insisting that he take responsibility for helping to plan his own wedding.
2. Ask others to help you. There's too much work to do it all by yourself, even if the groom is an equal wedding planning partner. Of course, you shouldn't have tempter tantrums if everyone doesn't do things exactly when and how you want them done, but there's nothing wrong with delegating tasks politely.
3. Stand up to anyone you encounter in the bridal industry who aggressively tries to sell you stuff you don't want. The bridal industry plays upon women who think they need to spend a fortune and who are afraid to say no. Refuse to do business with anyone who won't take no for an answer.
4. Make sure you're getting the services and products you've paid for. For example, go over the final menu carefully and make sure it's as you requested. If the caterers fail to follow through on something, insist on a partial refund. There's nothing wrong with refusing to let people rip you off.
5. Refuse unreasonable requests from family. Tell you future mother-in-law that no, it's not possible to invite everyone in her extended family. Tell your cousin that you're sorry, but you really don't need another bridesmaid. Be polite and tactful, but firm.
6. Intervene if politics between family and friends are interfering with the wedding planning. For example, if your divorced parents are flipping out about being in the same room together, tell them to stop now. If your two bridesmaids who hate each other and are griping constantly, tell them to give it a rest. Ignore minor conflicts, but you shouldn't have deal with other people's excessive baggage on your wedding day.
7. Make follow-up calls before the wedding to all businesses and people who are counting on to help you out.

Tips & Warnings

• Don't worry if you slip into Bridezilla mode occasionally. It's a stressful event and if you don't handle things with perfect grace all of the time, it's understandable.