How to Help your Spouse Lose Weight

Constant progress.

You've been married for a while, had a couple of kids and settled into a lifestyle that is, well, predictable. Over time, you and your spouse put on weight. Getting it off is easy for you; after all, corporate offers you health club membership at a tremendous discount. But it's not so easy for your spouse; after all, her days never end and free time is nonexistent. She's gained weight--you've remarked on it--and just like the stars on television, she flits from one diet to the next expecting instant results. She feels constrained by the mandates associated with dieting especially when she sees you raiding the refrigerator and prying through the cupboards for a snack. Before long, she, or he, has given up, and all thoughts of losing weight are discarded, along with self-esteem. Luckily, there's a way around this dilemma. If you really care about your spouse, here's how to work with him or her to get that weight under control and live a longer, happier life together.

Instructions

1. Scrap the dieting. To lose weight, your spouse doesn't need a specific diet. There are dozens--hundreds--to choose from, but they all communicate to the person faced with dieting that they've somehow been bad. It's a lie of course, used by companies and authors interested in shaming consumers into buying their products. To be successful, your spouse needs to begin eating for the person he wants to be rather than the person he is. And to do that, he needs your help.

2. Know that it's all about portions. Working with your spouse, learn to pay attention to the recommended serving sizes listed on all prepared foods. Understand what a 4-ounce serving of steak looks like. Develop an appreciation for the wealth of calories contained in fast foods and the dearth of them in foods prepared at home. Learn with your spouse what your average daily calorie intake should be compared to hers. Often, a simple, regular portion of one-third for her and two-thirds for you of any given meal will be enough to start her scale on a downward trend.

3. Don't avoid it, confront it. Many people believe that cutting out certain foods entirely will result in instant and significant weight loss. Sadly, when they arrive at a weight with which they're satisfied and resume "normal" eating, their weight balloons. Indeed, this is the very definition of the yo-yo diet. It's OK to avoid the obvious pitfalls such as flagrant eating out. Not only will both of you save calories, you'll save loads of money. But when need dictates, learn to live with going out. A great tactic is for you to order your favorite dish while your husband, orders something healthier. When the meal arrives, give your husband, your plate so he can enjoy a pair of fresh, hot bites. After that, get your plate back and eat your meal reserving the last two bites for your spouse. When the meal is over, you and your spouse will feel as though you've indulged in your favorites while simultaneously preserving your healthy lifestyle.

4. Think about the holidays. It's better to give than to receive, so give your spouse the opportunity to plan the meal around her newly developing healthier lifestyle. Look for alternatives to traditionally calorie-laden foods such as pecan pie and sweet potato casserole. For example, pecan pies can be purchased in a tartlet size which dramatically reduces their caloric penalty. Likewise, whip your sweet potatoes adding all your favorite flavoring spices. If you like a sweeter mixture, try sprinkling a scant amount of brown sugar over the top once you've dished your portion. Be creative and fearless.

5. Do the math. You may not enjoy the experience, but going food shopping with your spouse will open your eyes to what's being peddled to consumers these days. As you stroll down the aisles, pick up those frozen breakfast foods and read the nutrition information. When you head into the snack aisle, heft a bag of your favorite tortilla chips and read the data. Do the same with cookies, processed meats and leisure fare such as hot dogs. Once you find a hot dog that (a) you like and (b) isn't a calorie shocker, head over to the bread aisle, pick up a bag of hot dog buns and take a gander at the calorie count. Just by adding the bun, the calorie count for the hot dog will more than double. Consider your alternatives. If you like kraut dogs, pile the kraut onto a plate, cut in the dog, dress it with mustard and skip the bun. Voilà! Now, the meal is not only tasty, it's healthy. This kind of experimentation will teach you and your spouse to outwit the marketers who care far more about their profits than your health.

6. Praise, praise, praise. It's OK to pat yourself on the back when you do something great. Likewise, it's more than necessary for you to praise your spouse for his dedication to the new lifestyle. The weight loss won't be precipitous, but it will be constant. And, with every pound your spouse loses, it's another several days of lifespan you can add to your relationship.

Tips & Warnings

• Consider periodically using meal replacement drinks and healthy frozen meals to decrease the kitchen workload.

• Get comfortable living your healthier lifestyle among your friends. Who knows, maybe some of them will follow your example.

• Grill rather than fry whenever possible. If it's snowing outside, wear a coat.

• Don't offer your spouse tastes. It's OK to eat different meals-together.

• Living a healthy lifestyle is addictive.

• Sequestering yourself won't increase the likelihood of overall weight loss success. Additionally, failing to meet your social obligations can be a negative experience. A healthy lifestyle is completely portable so don't forget to bring it with you whenever you go out.