How to Hold a Family Meeting

Conflicts and disagreements are a fact of life that most families need to deal with. Leaving issues open to assumption can lead to family battles, unless you hold a family meeting before problems arise. Rules need to be established, as well as assigning chores, in order to have a happy family. The parent should play the part of the moderator and the meeting should work as a round table discussion, where everyone has a turn to talk.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Announce the time and place for the meeting to take place. Let every member of the family know when to be there and encourage them to bring their own concerns to the discussion. Make an effort to include every member of the family, whether the issues involve them or not.

2. Set rules for talking. You won't want your meeting to be interrupted every few minutes with people trying to talk over each other, so set the rule before you start that everyone must wait for their turn to speak. Go around the room and let each family member say what they want and discuss the issue at hand.

3. Start the meeting by clarifying a specific problem to be discussed. The moderator should begin with a general problem that needs to be solved. Be exact and complete in pinpointing the issue so that everyone understands.

4. Go around the room after the moderator has introduced the first issue to be discussed. Start on one side and go around, asking the same question to each family member. Possible questions could be, "what solution do you think would work?" and "what are you willing to contribute to the solution?"

5. Take notes of each speaker to go over when it gets back to the moderator. List every point that is made, agreement and disagreement, in order to discuss every issue in fairness. The meeting should be as fair as possible and all family members should participate.

6. Analyze the opinions to come up with a feasible solution. Brainstorm with the entire family while you read back each proposed solution. Narrow the list by going around again and asking which one is the best and the most fair to everyone. Do this until the family has come to a conclusion.

7. Select the best solution and get commitments from all family members in the meeting. Restate the solution and make a plan to successfully implement it. Make sure that everyone is in agreement, then move to the next topic for the family meeting. Repeat these steps until all family members have been heard, then conclude the family meeting until future issues arise.

[JRIngrisano]

on 12/15/2007 Good piece. Though a family meeting may not always solve every problem, it does provide a channel of communication.