How to End a Teen's Destructive Relationship

The stress, hormonal changes and feelings of isolation that teens experience during years of transition make the phenomenon of a destructive relationship all too common. Unfortunately, in many cases, the more destructive the relationship becomes, the more tightly a teen will hold on to it. If you need to end a teen's destructive relationship, follow these steps.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

1. Correctly identify the relationship as destructive. A teen may be in a relationship that you don't like or disapprove of, but that doesn't mean it's destructive. To identify a relationship as destructive, consider all areas of the teen's life from general mood states to relationships with other friends to performance in school and extra-curricular activities. If the teen seems to be foundering in multiple areas, you can start thinking of the relationship as destructive.

2. Speak with the teen's friends. A teen involved in a destructive relationship is most likely to accept advice from his friends and reject advice from parents or authority figures. Most likely, a teen's friends will be aware that the teen is in a destructive relationship and will want to help end it. Speak with the teen's friends about what they think and what they suggest doing.

3. Place the teen with a therapist. A therapist, such as a counselor or a psychologist, is a meaningful way to help end the destructive relationship without drastically changing the teen's life. If the teen resists seeing a therapist, give the teen an option between the therapist and something more extreme and drastic, pointing out that a therapist requires only a couple hours a week at most.

4. Have an intervention. A destructive relationship often resembles the behavioral and psychological patterns of an addiction. Because of this, one of the most effective ways to end the relationship is to stage an intervention. An intervention should be one of the last resorts. If you decide to proceed with it, however, try to get as many of the teen's friends and family members involved as possible.

5. Involve other parties. If the relationship continues to spiral out of control, you need to start approaching it from the side of the teen's boyfriend or girlfriend. If parents are around, try to speak with them about the situation. If the situation gets dangerous or violent, call the police and try to get a restraining order issued. However, this tactic should only be used as a last resort.