How to Get an Aggressor Penalty in Ice Hockey

It would seem that if ice hockey penalized its players for being aggressors, at the beginning of a hockey match both teams would skate on the ice, warm up a bit and then all pile into a gigantic penalty box. Ice hockey is an aggressive sport and an "aggressor penalty" might seem to be an impossibility, but it's not. Everything in life is a matter of degree.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Understand that there are two "tack ons" available to a referee that can be applied during and following a fight--an "instigator" penalty and an "aggressor" penalty.
2. Realize that an aggressor penalty is defined by the hockey rule book as when a player "continues to throw punches in an attempt to inflict punishment on his opponent who is in a defenseless position or who is an unwilling combatant."
3. Be aware that this penalty carries a heavy punishment: a major penalty for fighting and a game misconduct, and if a player is called for an instigator penalty in addition to an aggressor penalty, he is assessed a minor two-minute penalty, a major five-minute penalty, a ten-minute fighting penalty and a game misconduct.
4. Consider that criminal charges of assault and civil suits are becoming common for the events defined by this penalty.
5. Pound your opponent into the ice and continue to punch him into oblivion if you have duly considered all of these realities and consequences.
6. Finish your mayhem and quickly head to the locker room before any of his teammates can extract retribution.