How to Avoid Becoming a Victim of Restraining Order Abuse

Unfortunately, plaintiffs in restraining order actions often abuse the system and their restraining orders. The following steps are not intended to discriminate against women by any means, however often women are the culprits of restraining order abuse. If you do not want to become a victim of restraining order abuse, thereby avoiding arrest, a possible jail sentence, expenses of attorney fees, fines, court costs, and probation fees, follow the steps below for your protection.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Knowledge of your state's Domestic Violence laws pertaining to restraining orders
• Common Sense
• Advice of an attorney if you need information about your state laws
• Obtain your own restraining order if your attorney advises so or if you believe you need one

1. Follow the terms of your restraining order exactly as directed. Any deviation from the restrictions of your order can result in your arrest for violation of a restraining order.

2. If you believe the plaintiff obtained the order without merit, obtain the advice of an attorney. In most states, the defendant (you) will be granted a hearing within 3 to 4 days of receiving your restraining order. Attend this hearing with your attorney to dispute the issuance of the order.

3. Do not contact the plaintiff by any means. This includes contact through friends, relatives, or coworkers. Do not phone, send email or text messages to the plaintiff. Do not use your children as “go betweens” in order to relay messages to the plaintiff.

4. If you are at your favorite hangout on Friday night and the plaintiff shows up at your location, leave immediately. The plaintiff can report a restraining violation if you are within the 100, 500 feet of the plaintiff, or whatever the terms of your order are.

5. Do not make the mistake of violating the terms of the court order just because the plaintiff sweetly tells you, “You can come to the house tonight.” You cannot go there, (unless there is a specific clause in the order), until the restraining order is lifted. Therefore, if the plaintiff tries to seduce you into unwittingly committing a violation, tell the plaintiff to drop the order first! Sometimes the plaintiff will ask you to come over and spend some time with the children (babysit) while she goes out or has an important situation to attend. At some point an argument may develop. Then, the defendant gets removed from the premises by the police. The plaintiff may not intend to do violate you, and the offer may be difficult for you to resist, but do not fall into this common trap.

Tips & Warnings

• If the plaintiff has justification to seek a restraining order against you, then you are an abuser, seek professional help on your own, not after you are ordered by the court
• If the plaintiff unjustly obtains a restraining order against you, forget about her and move on with your life. She is undeserving of your love and affection
• Committing a violation of a restraining order, could result in a jail sentence, expensive fees and fines, loss of your job, and chaos in your life.
• Do not let the plaintiff lure you with her sexuality. Do not go to the house and make love with her; it could lead to a rape charge.
• Please take this article very seriously. These things have and do happen!

[tinksloan]

on 10/14/2009 my son lives in New Hampshire, his ex-girlfriend lives in Maine.....She has been calling him and even came to the apartment to see him(when his roomate was there). He called her today by mistake on his cell phone, hung up quickly......She has a restraining order on him under faults information.....her parents found out and had him arrested. Did she not violate the order?

[Insightful]

on 1/6/2009 Chris26, Sorry, I couldn't fit all the words in the comment below.
Anyway, you should request that the police make HER leave (if you have car and custody at the time of the incident.
If done this way, the police report can be used at court as evidence for you to get the order dropped.

Good Luck!

[Insightful]

on 1/6/2009 Chris26,
That is typical in cases where there really isn't any abuse; they lie to get the orders.
You should go to your district court (or whatever court issued the order) and ask for a hearing. Attempt to get the order dropped because as long as she has an order (because she supposedly fears you), then she has no right to approach you either. In most states that is regarded as "Abuse of an order."
I'm assuming that you had care and custody of your daughter at the moment the offense occurred. If not - if your Ex had care and custody at the time - you should have left the practice for your own well being; she could have you charged with violating the order if you remain there.
However, if you have care and custody of your daughter when the offense occurs, you have every right to be there. In that case, you should call the police, tell them about the order, and request that they make

[CHRIS26]

on 1/1/2009 I have a PFA against me, because my ex-wife, lied to get one and She approached me at, my daughters cheer leading practice, and I told her to contact me through her lawyer and ask her to return to her seat. What should I do file a contempt motion against her.

[CHRIS26]

on 1/1/2009 I have a PFA against me, because my ex-wife, lied to get one and She approached me at, my daughters cheer leading practice, and I told her to contact me through her lawyer and ask her to return to her seat. What should I do file a contempt motion against her.