How to Raise a Trustworthy Teenager

In order for your child to become a trustworthy teenager he must be taught honesty from the beginning of his life and parents must be honest in return. If he knows his parents are trustworthy he will be the same. Some important steps to remember so your child will become a trustworthy teenager:

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. Answer all her questions. If you feel she is too young for the subject at hand tell her you feel this way. But be aware that if she is old enough to ask she is probably old enough to discuss it. Be open to this possibility. Kids have a way of growing up before you realize what is happening.

2. Consider that if he tells a lie there has to be consequences. Don’t be afraid to discipline him. A good scolding will usually do the trick simply because his wish is to please you. If it is something as serious as shoplifting, make him take the item back to the store with an apology. It isn’t uncommon for a child to take something from the store without asking or paying for it, so don’t over react.

3. Always be honest. There are some things you may not wish to dispel, according to maturity, but there are ways of answering questions without going into detail. If you are not honest and she finds out, she will not trust you and will not be trustworthy. Be advised; many kids can tell when someone is lying to them.

4. Explain how hard it is to regain trust, preferably before they have lost yours. If this lesson is taught early on they will not want to go through having to rebuild trust once it’s been broken.

5. Don’t panic if she is withdrawn for a day or two. Just because she wants time alone in her room doesn’t mean she’s smoking crack. Remember when we were teenagers, sullen and withdrawn, too. However, if it lasts for weeks or months, it might be time to worry.

6. Don’t fly off the deep end if he confesses to something. If he comes clean about something and you panic, he will not come to you again. Stay calm and talk with him about what he did, why he did it and if possible what he needs to do to make it right.

7. Give up control and trust her. There comes a time when parents must put trust in their teenager to make the right decisions. If you have raised her to know there are consequences for bad decisions she will most likely make the right ones.

8. Praise him for his honesty and who he is. By doing this you are assuring him that you are very proud. That is something he will not want to lose, which will cause him to have second and third thoughts about his choices.

Resources

• Trust the Teenager
• Trust Versus Control
• Family and Community Development

[chenderson00]

on 2/24/2009 Great advice. Thankfully I don't have this to worry about right now, but my mother is and was when I was a teen 100% honest. 5*s