How to raise the self esteem of a Green

Wouldn’t it be nice to wake up each day and have a totally positive outlook? You greet your family at the breakfast table and they actually greet you back. At work, your co-workers build each other up and applaud each others’ accomplishments. When you get home, your spouse lovingly greats you and you listen patiently as your spouse details the day’s events and eagerly awaits you to share your day. In this scenario, everyone is operating on all cylinders and is in “Esteem.” Esteem is how you see yourself as in “self-esteem.” Depending on your personality, there are hints when you are “Out of Esteem.” This article will help you identify a Green personality type, one of the four True Colors personality types, that is “Out of Esteem” and how to get the Green type back in esteem. By identifying “Out of Esteem” traits and subsequently taking appropriate action to bring those traits into congruence, you will raise your “Self-Esteem” and the esteem of others. Just imagine a world where people focused more on raising each others’ self esteem and just how life giving and rewarding it would be.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Clear mind
• True Colors Personality Test

1. Identify Green personality traits that demonstrate they are in esteem like the following:
   Questioning
   Independent
   Pleasant but not socially involved
   High expectations
   Strives for improvement
2. Identify Green personality traits that demonstrate when they are out of esteem:
   Perfectionism tied to performance anxiety
   Aloof, snobbish, and silent treatment
   Indecisive
   Highly critical of others
   Refuses to comply or cooperate
3. Greens like more technical tools Determine “what is the cause of the out of esteem behavior?” Ask questions or observe if their joys, values, and needs are being met (see article on how to spot an Orange, Green, Blue, and Gold). For example, if a Green is indecisive then help him/her to become more decisive by getting the core of the issue. Sometimes Greens need to have more data to make a decision. With their high standards and susceptibility to perfectionism, help them to frame the “standard” for the quality of the product or decision. An 80% solution may be what is needed not a 100% solution. Keep building on successes and see their esteem rise.
4. Determine if any of their stresses are being activated (see article on how to spot an Orange, Green, Blue, and Gold). For example, you set a staff meeting. Since you know Greens value competence and purpose, would it not be appropriate to send an agenda out as you set the meeting with the purpose and expected deliverables tied to the mission/vision of your organization or work section? This will allow input into refining the agenda and it will help prepare the Greens for the meeting so they can think about their participation. At the staff meeting, link the meeting with the overall purpose/expected outcomes so the Greens will have the big picture.

Tips & Warnings

• Seek to determine the Greens specific joys, values, and needs. This requires exercising patience and excellent listening skills because Greens will break down issues/problems to see how the parts fit/relate to the whole. Give them time to process, think, and integrate their thoughts.
• Remember that just because a Green questions an action does not mean they are opposed. Greens need to understand before they can become congruent with a course of action. If not congruent, they will opt out. If a Green is out of esteem, expect sarcastic, cutting, and hurtful comments. Greens feel deeply so don’t expect to understand their feelings right away. Listen for clues to help solve the puzzle to the motivations behind their actions. Bring the discussion to a logical, less emotional focus and you may have more success in finding out their core issue.