How to Enjoy the Holidays as a Single Parent

No matter if you are a single parent by choice, a widow or widower, divorced or separated, the holidays can create conflict and additional stresses for the single parent. Recognize that having unrealistic expectations for yourself or anyone else will only lead to disappointment.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Involve your children in all aspects of holiday planning. Take into account their desires. That doesn't mean giving in to everything they want, but instead, taking the time to listen carefully to what they have to say before making any final decisions.
2. Review the plans with the children. You may have do to do this several times, especially if it involves the children traveling alone or spending extensive time away from you.
3. Discuss gifts and activities with your former spouse or anyone else who will be giving the children presents. Remember that time spent with children doing things you all enjoy is an invaluable gift. Don't try to compete with anyone.
4. Take care of yourself. If you have been "doing it all," now is the time to schedule some enjoyable activities for yourself. Whether it's getting a massage, having lunch with a friend or going bowling with the guys, recognize that you need to be happy in order for your children to be happy.
5. It's not worth fighting over "the day." Be creative in how you celebrate and recognize that you can create new family traditions and activities. Kids won't remember or care if was on the actual holiday or a day or week later.
6. Spend time with people whose company you enjoy. If you are not comfortable in a situation, neither you or your children will have a good time. It's perfectly all right to decline some invitations.

Tips & Warnings

• If you share custody, send the children off with a smile. It's hard for children to enjoy themselves if they are worrying about their other parent.
• Remember: Different isn't necessarily bad, it's just different. Embrace new ways of celebrating and create new traditions.
• Your attitude will play a large part in influencing your children's attitude.

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