How to Identify Codogpendent People

Codogpendency is the deep denial that one’s dog is displaying inappropriate behavior. It causes a person to make excuses for or misidentify the dog’s behavior to keep from admitting that changing their own behavior could improve the situation. Codogpendency abounds. It is found in dog parks and pet supply stores and can be contagious. Nobody is immune from this disorder, we all suffer a bout of it from time to time. Blindness to negative aspects of a beloved pet’ s personality is a side effect of love.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Codogpendent people are often very kind and loving. This makes it hard to tell them they are driving you nuts and destroying their dog mentally. Do not encourage them. RUN!
2. Codogpendent people enable their dogs' addictions by indulging them and pressuring you to do the same.
   
   You may be trying to ignore their lab and the slobber soaked ball he keeps trying to force into your hand. The codogpendent will clear her throat and say, "I think Cody wants you to throw his ball for him."
   
   Really?
3. A dog may be barking at your dog with his teeth bared and his hackles up. A codogpendent owner will say, "He isn't being aggressive. He thinks he's a snapping turtle." There is no end to the imagination and creativity of the dogged codogpendent.
4. A codogpendent who owns the dog that is mounting you while you are trying to read in the park might tell you, "Wow, he must really like you." You may respond with, "I can't imagine what he must do to you."
5. A codogpendent often owns a very "large boned" dog. Examples might be a 30 lb.chihuahua or a 180 lb Siberian. These people can often be heard saying things such as "She won't eat dog food. She thinks she's a person."
6. You may attempt to do an intervention. Be prepared that this will most likely earn you a place in the dog house. There will be room in there, the codogpendents dog cannot go out alone because he is afraid of the backyard. He has never used the dog house and actually, this location is most likely preferable to being indoors with the codogpendent.

Tips & Warnings

• If a friend or family member is codogpendent, try to get help for them. Sometimes a mirror or video is helpful. Re-read step 6 before doing so.
• Codogpendents are just dog crazy, not stupid. They will not appreciate the voice of reason.
• If you suspect that a stranger is a codogpendent, do not engage in conversation. Do what is best for you, RUN!
• Interventions are frowned upon by codogpendents.
• Beware of those soulful eyes and sweet puppy breath. You too, may suffer a codogpendent relationship if you are not careful.