How to Help a Teen Mother

Contrary to the judgements of busybodies and the sound bites of politicians, teen mothers are not the dregs of humanity. Teenagers get pregnant in every country and society on the globe, though the circumstances of and response to the pregnancy vary by community. In the United States, for example, teen mothers are often impregnated by adult men, victims of child abuse, victims of sexual abuse and/or victims of abuse perpetrated by the man who impregnated them. Unfortunately, it doesn’t end there. They spend years taking verbal abuse from family, coworkers, bosses and others who enjoy kicking people while they are down.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Be nice. A little kindness goes a long way for a teen mother who is accustomed to a fielding a barrage of judgment and epithets. Show her friendship and the same respect you would any mom.
2. Stand up for her. When others hurl verbal abuse her way or get snide behind her back, come to her defense. Make it clear that ill behavior toward her will not be tolerated.
3. Help with childcare. Offer to babysit for free while she works or attends school. She needs an income and an education to properly support her child. Babysitting for free will help her to make the most of presumably limited funds.
4. Bring her dinner. Make an extra portion once a week and offer it to her. It will free up some time and help to ensure she is eating properly and enough.
5. Get her a used computer. In the age of the Internet, not only will a computer help a teen mother develop valuable job skills, it can be the gateway to a college degree. Many accredited schools and universities are now offering complete degree programs online.
6. Introduce her to Freecycle. It is a great resource for free clothes, toys and children’s goods. Getting involved with a local Freecycle group make a significant dent in her expenses. She might even be able to get materials for school or clothes for work.
7. Give her gifts that are for her. When her birthday or the holidays roll around, resist the urge to give her things for the baby or the house. Aim for something she will enjoy to show her that she is more to you than just a teen mother.

Tips & Warnings

• Remember that she is both a teen and a mother and expect to see both manifest in her personality.