How to Help a Teen Mother
Contrary to the sound bites of some politicians, teen mothers are not the dregs of humanity. Teenagers get pregnant in every country and society on the globe, though the circumstances of and response to the pregnancy vary by community. In almost all cases, teen moms need all the help they can get. If you're in the position to assist a teen mother, there are quite a few things you can do to ease some of her worries and a few of her financial burdens. And just being a sympathetic ear is helpful: On top of the stresses of being a new parent, a teen mom endures a lot of verbal abuse from peers and even the adults around her.
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Instructions
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Be nice. A little kindness goes a long way for a teen mother who is accustomed to a fielding a barrage of judgment and epithets. Show her friendship and the same respect you would any mom.
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Stand up for her. When others hurl verbal abuse her way or get snide behind her back, come to her defense. Make it clear that ill behavior toward her will not be tolerated.
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Help with child care. Offer to babysit for free while she works or attends school. She needs an income and an education to properly support her child. Babysitting for free will help her to make the most of presumably limited funds.
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Bring her dinner. Make an extra portion once a week and offer it to her. It will free up some time and help to ensure she is eating properly and enough.
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Get her a used computer. In the age of the Internet, not only will a computer help a teen mother develop valuable job skills, it can be the gateway to a college degree. Many accredited schools and universities are now offering complete degree programs online.
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Introduce her to organizations like Freecycle, which is a great resource for free clothes, toys and children's goods. Getting involved with a local Freecycle group can make a significant dent in her expenses. She might even be able to get materials for school or clothes for work.
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Research local agencies that provide services and counseling for teen mothers. You alone will not be able to provide all of the guidance and financial assistance a teen mother needs. Planned Parenthood, for example, has Teen Success programs in many states that help teen mothers finish school, make long-term plans and develop life skills. Look for similar local support groups and help the teen apply for grants and affordable housing assistance, if needed.
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Give her gifts that are for her. When her birthday or the holidays roll around, resist the urge to only give her things for the baby or the house. Aim for something she will enjoy to show her that she is more to you than just a teen mother.
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Tips & Warnings
Remember that she is both a teen and a mother and expect to see both manifest in her behavior. Don't tolerate actions that endanger her or the baby, but do be patient — motherhood is a steep learning curve for all women, and teens are still developing the ability to reason and follow through on responsibilities.
